Know What Not to Say

Article by  Jon Bloom

Christians should be the most careful speakers in the world. We ought to be characterized by two kinds of trembling when it comes to words: we should tremble at the words God speaks and we should tremble at the words we speak.

We know we should tremble at God’s word, for he tells us,

“This is the one to whom I will look: he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word.” (Isaiah 66:2)

But why should we tremble at the words we speak? Because Jesus said,

“I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:36–37)

“Every careless word.” That should stop us in our tracks. It should set us trembling, considering how many words we speak. And by “speak” I mean every word that comes out of our mouths, our pens, and our keyboards. We speak thousands of words every day, sometimes tens of thousands.

When we experience these two kinds of trembling, they occur for the same reason: we love and fear God and don’t want to profane his holy word or to profane his holiness with our unholy words. Such trembling makes us want to speak carefully and sometimes not speak at all. Because we believe,

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: . . . a time to keep silence, and a time to speak. (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7)

A Time to Be Silent

There really is a time to keep silent. And that time comes more often than most of us are conditioned to think.

We live in an age of unceasing talk. Never in human history has the noise of human communication been so constant. Even when we are quiet we are not silent, as we receive and dispense talk through our digital media. Our culture does not believe that “a fool multiplies words” (Ecclesiastes 10:14).

On one level, it believes that multiplied words brings multiplied knowledge, and multiplied knowledge brings multiplied wisdom. On another level, not fearing God, it simply doesn’t really care how many words flow. So it relentlessly inundates us with information, analysis, commentary, critique, punditry, and mockery through every communication stream. We cannot help but be conditioned by this environment.

And with the advent of social media, nearly everyone now has a broadcast platform from which they can publicly hold forth on any social, cultural, political, economic, or theological issue, any controversy, any scandal, any whatever anytime they wish, regardless of what they know. And while the democratization of public communication is a remarkable historic phenomenon and certainly has some wonderful benefits, it is a dangerous thing, spiritually speaking. It’s an immense, cacophonous forum of multiplied, foolish, careless words, for which every participant, whether they know it or not, will give an account to God.

The Beginning of Wisdom

Christians know that “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” and “the beginning of knowledge” (Psalm 111:10; Proverbs 1:7). And one expression of that fear is trembling at God’s holy word, and at our own.

We are taught that it is profoundly wise for us to cultivate the discipline of being slow to speak (James 1:19). Slow to speak implies that there is a time for silence. Sometimes it means we are silent for some appropriate brief or extended period of time while being quick to hear (listening carefully), so we gain an accurate understanding of an issue before we speak carefully. And sometimes it means we don’t speak at all. The former is always a necessity for us; the latter is often a necessity.

God calls us to live counter to our hair tongue-trigger culture. In a world where rapid-fire information, rapid-fire commentary, and rapid-fire counter-commentary are continually igniting raging forest fires of words (James 3:5), the sons and daughters of God are called to be fire-quenching peacemakers (Matthew 5:9). And one of the underutilized ways of peacemaking is recognizing the time to keep silence. Less words can be less fuel for the fires.

A Time to Speak

But Christians must not always keep silence. There is a time to speak and there are things we must say. Our God is a speaking God and we know he most definitely wants us to speak (Matthew 24:14; 28:19–20).

But when God speaks, he speaks very intentionally and, considering his omniscience, he speaks with tremendous restraint. And that’s the way he wants us to speak, as his exceedingly non-omniscient children and ambassadors (2 Corinthians 5:20): intentionally and with restraint. He wants us to learn to speak like Jesus.

We, like Job, have the tendency to speak rashly and confidently about things we really don’t understand (Job 42:3). But Jesus often said less than he knew because he was prayerfully listening to the Father and saying only what he discerned he was supposed to say (John 8:26). Just because he had a mouth and a public platform did not mean he should always employ them. Rather, he said, “I do nothing on my own authority, but speak just as the Father taught me” (John 8:28). He perfectly lived out and modeled for us this verse:

Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips! (Psalm 141:3)

God deploys his children strategically in every sphere. He gives us each a few assignments and gives us each some things to say in order to bring the gospel to bear in our limited spheres. Each of us must prayerfully discern our spheres and limitations. None of us, as individuals, churches, or organizations, is called to address every current issue. And if this is true of issues we have knowledge about, it’s especially true of issues with which we have little or no personal experience.

If we are in some form of leadership where we are called to address such an issue, we should first pray for wisdom, then we should be publicly honest about what we don’t know and not succumb to pressure and try to speak more than we do know. And then, if the Lord leads, we should pursue the understanding required to speak more helpfully.

And when we do discern God’s direction for us to speak, we, like Jesus, remember that our mouths, fingers, and platforms still belong to God. We are not free to say whatever we wish about what we know. We do nothing on our own authority, but must say only what we discern God wants us to say.

Tough, Tender, or Quiet?

We speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), but we don’t speak for human “likes”; we speak for God’s approval. So that means we sometimes speak a loving truth that’s tender and sweet (Proverbs 16:24), and other times we speak a loving truth that’s graciously hard (Proverbs 27:6). This is speaking like Jesus, who sometimes said things like, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28), and who at other times said things like, “Unless you repent, you will all likewise perish” (Luke 13:5).

Discerning when to say a loving tender truth, when to say a loving tough truth, and when to say nothing at all is the tension God has purposefully designed to keep us prayerfully dependent on him. It is frequently not patently obvious. There are times we really want to speak and we should not. And there are times we really don’t want to speak and we should.

What will help us most in discerning when it’s a time to keep silence or a time to speak is cultivating a holy trembling at God’s word and at our words. The right kind of fear of the Lord is our best mouthguard.

Jon Bloom (@Bloom_Jon) serves as author, board chair, and co-founder of Desiring God. He is author of three books, Not by Sight, Things Not Seen, and Don’t Follow Your Heart. He and his wife live in the Twin Cities with their five children.

Originally posted on DesiringGod.org  https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/know-what-not-to-say

Psalm 118 A Remedy for the Fear of Man

Psalm 118:1-4

“Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good;

His love endures forever.

Let Israel say:

“His love endures forever.”

Let the house of Aaron say:

“His love endures forever.”

Let those who fear the Lord say:

“His love endures forever.”

Think about the amazing gift of God’s love.  It is not His rejection and wrath that last forever. When God looks at His children, those who have trusted in Christ as their Lord and Savior, He sees us clothed in Christ’s holiness and righteousness.  When we are in Christ, when we are united in Him by faith, God loves us like He loves His own Son.

His love endures forever.  (Not the love of friends or those who we try so desperately to get approval from.  Only His love is forever.)

His love endures forever.  (God’s love will never change.  There is nothing we can do to make God love us more.  And there is nothing we can do to make God love us less.  God’s love is about Him, not us!)

His love endures forever.  (God’s love doesn’t change.  God’s love is not based on our performance or anything we do or don’t do.  God’s love is about what Christ has already done on the cross.)

His love endures forever.  (It is possible to lose the love of friends, parents, spouses, boyfriends and girlfriends, but God’s love will never end.  It is forever!)

Are you resting in the love of God or are you chasing after a lesser love from other people?

Adapted from a booklet by Amy Baker

The Heart of True Repentance

Article by Matt Erbaugh

Originally posted on DesiringGod.org

Few things in the life of a believer are as disheartening as the long struggle with persistent sins. This is particularly true when we have experienced victory over sin in other areas of our life. We know God has the power to get rid of our sin, so why won’t he?

It may sound counterintuitive, but sometimes victory over some sin tarries because God desires to teach us how to truly repent of that sin. God desires his people to know not only how to walk in holiness, but also to obey his command to “rend our hearts” when we fall short of his glory (Joel 2:13). Yes, sin in our life is a problem, but so is a life where we haven’t learned how to truly repent of sin.

Torn Hearts

We’ve all probably seen a pastor illustrate the concept of repentance during a Sunday morning sermon. He walks across the stage on the “path of sin” and tells us that repenting is not merely stopping as we walk down the path, but turning to walk back in the direction of God. This is absolutely right; repentance involves both turning away from sin and turning back to the Father. However, the illustration fails to provide the posture of our heart as we come back to God. This is no incidental point, but gets to the very core of what true repentance is all about.

“True repentance, like all good things, is a gift of God.”

In Joel 2:12, the Lord calls to Israel, “return to me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; and rend your hearts and not your garments.” In the Old Testament, people commonly expressed great grief and anguish by tearing their cloaks. But more than caring about the proper “signs” of being upset about their sin, God cared that they actually grieved over them in their hearts — grieved to the point of weeping and mourning.

In his famous psalm of repentance, David reminds us that God does not delight so much in the outward signs of repentance (which included making a sacrifice), but “the sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise” (Psalm 51:17). We’re not talking about the shame and condemnation the enemy wants to heap on us, but a godly grief.

We can be in the habit of going through the motions when it comes to repenting, but these passages show that the most important thing is the condition of our heart. Does your repentance look like a heart that has been rent like a garment, broken and contrite as it beats before God? This attitude is missing from most repentance, and it’s the very thing God is trying to teach us!

How to Get a Broken Heart

It may sound strange, but how do we go about getting a broken heart?

“The more glimpses we have of the glory of God, the more we mourn for scorning that glory.”

First, we simply need to ask for it. True repentance, like all good things, is a gift of God (2 Timothy 2:25). If we want to obey the command to rend our hearts, we must ask God to grant us true repentance.

We must also be aware of one of the biggest hindrances to obtaining a broken heart: our neglect of the relational aspect of sinning. By this, I mean that we can view sin as a failure of performance rather than a failure of intimacy. The only grief we experience is disappointment in our inability to do what is right, and not that we have “despised” the living God (2 Samuel 12:9).

When we sin, we play the part of an adulterer who looks for satisfaction in another, rather than the only One who can satisfy. That is why David said to the Lord, “against you, you only, have I sinned” (Psalm 51:4). David rightly saw his failures in terms of relationship, and as a result his heart was grieved as it can be only when we have sinned against the One we love so much.

Behold His Glory

Finally, true repentance comes not merely by understanding the relational aspect of sin, but by understanding the nature of the One with whom we are in relationship. In other words, the more we see God as glorious and holy, the more we will see sin as something to weep over. Repentance is less about feeling bad over behavior, and more about feeling awe and delight towards God. The more glimpses we have of the glory of God, the more we mourn for scorning that glory.

In the end, God’s plan for us is that we will be holy as he is holy (1 Peter 1:16). He will surely do it! In the meantime, he desires a broken-hearted people who have learned to mourn over their sin.

Don't Worry, Worship!

This column, written by Dr. Heath Lambert, originally appeared in the print edition of the Florida Baptist Witness.  Taken from ACBC website.

Worry is a sin. That statement is one of the most controversial I have ever made. I would not know how to describe the number of people I have angry with me over making such an observation. That is too bad for a couple of reasons. The first reason is that I do not like to say things that are controversial. I have never been joyful about saying things that are upsetting to anybody—much less many people. In fact, I have something of a rule: and that is that I only make controversial statements if they are explicitly warranted from Scripture.

That gets to the second sad reality about the negative reaction I get when I say that worry is a sin. The Bible is clear that worry is a sin. We run from this reality in our culture. We prefer to medicalize worry, saying that it is a biological issue requiring medical treatment, or we minimize it saying that it is not a big deal—God, I’ve heard many say, understands when we worry a little bit. The problem here is that when we speak that way, we speak in a way that is not informed by Scripture. In fact, the most common command to appear in the pages of Scripture is God’s demand to “fear not.”   God thinks worry is a massive issue and he commands us to avoid it more than any other thing.

One place where we see God’s command to avoid worry is from the lips of Jesus Christ in the Sermon on the Mount. Jesus commands his disciples three times to avoid the sin of worry (Matt 6:25, 31, 34). More than giving the command to avoid worry, Jesus also explains in his sermon why worry is such a big deal. Worry, Jesus says, is at odds with faith (Matt 6:30). We know that without faith it is impossible to please God (Heb 11:6). Fear explicitly undermines this faith in God by doubting his good care for us. That is why Jesus can say that people who engage in the sin of worry are guilty of having “little faith.”

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus does not merely remind that worry is a sin, and he does not only explain why it is a sin. He also shows how we can fight worry. Jesus encourages us to fight worry with worship. Let me explain.

Jesus does not merely issue the command to avoid worry, he explains some very tangible truths about God that work to undermine worry. First, Jesus talks about the sovereignty of God in making provision for the natural world. He points out that the birds of the air and flowers of the field are more than adequately provided for by the sovereign God of the universe (Matt 6:26, 28-29). Second, Jesus makes it clear that God’s love for his people is much greater than his love for any bird or flower (Matt 6:26, 30).

Jesus is fueling our worship. He knows that worriers characterized by small faith need to turn their eyes on the sovereign God of the universe who has complete control over his creation, and who is determined to direct that control towards his people that he loves so much. Jesus is saying, in effect, “Don’t worry, worship.”

24 Things Love Is.....

Article by Paul David Tripp

What is love?

You won't find the best answer on the pages of Wikipedia, Merriam-Webster or Shakespeare. No, the best definition of love was established at an event, the most important event in human history: the cross of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Christ's sacrifice of love is the ultimate example of what love is and what love does. Here's a definition I like to use:

Love is willing self-sacrifice for the good of another that does not require reciprocation or that the person being loved is deserving.

If we are followers of Jesus Christ and believe in the cross for salvation, then our words and actions and responses must be motivated by cruciform love. That is, love that shapes itself to the cross of the Lord Jesus Christ (cruci = "cross" and form = "in the shape of").

On this Valentine's Day, here are 23 more ways that you can express cruciform love in your daily living.

1. LOVE IS being willing to have your life complicated by the needs and struggles of others without impatience or anger.

2. LOVE IS actively fighting the temptation to be critical and judgmental toward another while looking for ways to encourage and praise.

3. LOVE IS making a daily commitment to resist the needless moments of conflict that come from pointing out and responding to minor offenses.

4. LOVE IS being lovingly honest and humbly approachable in times of misunderstanding.

5. LOVE IS being more committed to unity and understanding than you are to winning, accusing, or being right.

6. LOVE IS a making a daily commitment to admit your sin, weakness, and failure and to resist the temptation to offer an excuse or shift the blame.

7. LOVE IS being willing, when confronted by another, to examine your heart rather than rising to your defense or shifting the focus.

8. LOVE IS making a daily commitment to grow in love so that the love you offer to another is increasingly selfless, mature, and patient.

9. LOVE IS being unwilling to do what is wrong when you have been wronged, but looking for concrete and specific ways to overcome evil with good.

10. LOVE IS being a good student of another, looking for their physical, emotional, and spiritual needs so that in some way you can remove the burden, support them as they carry it, or encourage them along the way.

11. LOVE IS being willing to invest the time necessary to discuss, examine, and understand the relational problems you face, staying on task until the problem is removed or you have agreed upon a strategy of response.

12. LOVE IS being willing to always ask for forgiveness and always being committed to grant forgiveness when it is requested.

13. LOVE IS recognizing the high value of trust in a relationship and being faithful to your promises and true to your word.

14. LOVE IS speaking kindly and gently, even in moments of disagreement, refusing to attack the other person’s character or assault their intelligence.

15. LOVE IS being unwilling to flatter, lie, manipulate, or deceive in any way in order to co-opt the other person into giving you what you want or doing something your way.

16. LOVE IS being unwilling to ask another person to be the source of your identity, meaning, and purpose, or inner sense of well-being, while refusing to be the source of theirs.

17. LOVE IS the willingness to have less free time, less sleep, and a busier schedule in order to be faithful to what God has called you to be and to do as a spouse, parent, neighbor, etc.

18. LOVE IS a commitment to say no to selfish instincts and to do everything that is within your ability to promote real unity, functional understanding, and active love in your relationships.

19. LOVE IS staying faithful to your commitment to treat another with appreciation, respect, and grace, even in moments when the other person doesn’t seem deserving or is unwilling to reciprocate.

20. LOVE IS the willingness to make regular and costly sacrifices for the sake of a relationship without asking for anything in return or using your sacrifices to place the other person in your debt.

21. LOVE IS being unwilling to make any personal decision or choice that would harm a relationship, hurt the other person, or weaken the bond of trust between you.

22. LOVE IS refusing to be self-focused or demanding, but instead looking for specific ways to serve, support, and encourage, even when you are busy or tired.

23. LOVE IS daily admitting to yourself, the other person, and God that you are unable to be driven by a cruciform love without God’s protecting, providing, forgiving, rescuing, and delivering grace.

God bless

Paul David Tripp (originally posted on PaulDavidTripp.com

Reflection Questions

1. For more on cruciform love, spend time reading, and meditating on, 1 John 4:7-21.
2. Print this list out or save it to your phone and revisit it, asking the Lord to show you where you can grow in cruciform love.

The Greatest Thing You Could Do Today

Article by Francis Chan

Imagine walking up a mountain alone. But it’s no ordinary mountain. The ground beneath you is shaking, and the entire mountain is covered in smoke. At its peak is a thick cloud with lightning and thunder. God descends onto the mountain in fire, and each time you speak to him, he responds in thunder. This is what Moses experienced in Exodus 19.

Now compare that experience to your last time in prayer.

Distracted, obligatory, ordinary — I doubt any such words came across Moses’s mind as he ascended the mountain. But some three thousand years later, we rarely marvel that God permits imperfect humans into his presence.

How did the shocking become so ordinary to us? Is it even possible for our experiences with God to be that fascinating?

Going Up the Mountain

“When was the last time you enjoyed meaningful time alone with God, time so good that you didn’t want to leave?”

A mentor of mine lives in India. Last year, he called me on the phone crying, distraught over the state of the church in America. “It seems like the people in America would be content to take a selfie with Moses. Don’t they know they can go up the mountain themselves? Why don’t they want to go up the mountain?”

When was the last time you enjoyed meaningful time alone with God? Time so good that you didn’t want to leave. It was just you, reading God’s words, in his holy presence.

I was fifteen years old when my youth pastor taught me how to pray and read the Bible alone. Now, more than thirty years later, I still can’t find a better way to start my days. I can’t imagine what my life would be like if I didn’t refocus daily by going up the mountain.

It is alone with him that I empty myself of pride, lies, and stress.

• Pride: standing before a Person clothed in unapproachable light has a way of humbling you (1 Timothy 6:16).
• Lies: speaking to an All-Knowing Judge tends to induce honesty (Hebrews 4:13).
• Stress: kneeling before the God who causes men to fail or succeed replaces our anxiety with peace (Psalm 127:1).

Professional Gatherers

We often spend a lot of time and effort gathering believers together. We’ve become experts at gathering Christians around great bands, speakers, and events. Where we have failed is in teaching believers how to be alone with God. When is the last time you heard someone rave about their time alone with Jesus in his word? Gathering believers who don’t spend time alone with God can be a dangerous thing.

“We live among a people more eager to take a selfie with Moses than talk to God themselves.”

Dietrich Bonhoeffer writes in Life Together:

Whoever cannot be alone should be aware of community. Such people will only do harm to themselves and to the community. Alone you stood before God when God called you. Alone you had to obey God’s voice. Alone you had to take up your cross, struggle, and pray, and alone you will die and give an account to God. You cannot avoid yourself, for it is precisely God who has called you out. If you do not want to be alone, you are rejecting Christ’s call to you, and you can have no part in the community of those who are called.

The word community is thrown around quite a bit in Christian circles today. But our gatherings can be toxic if we do not spend time alone with God. I’ve been in many groups where people share their insights. The problem is not only that our insights are not as profound as we think they are, but that we’re so eager to share thoughts originating in our own minds, when we have a God who says,

          “My thoughts are not your thoughts,
               neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
          For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
               so are my ways higher than your ways
               and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (Isaiah 55:8–9)

I want to know the thoughts of God. I want to gather with people who have been reading God’s words, people who have prayed and interacted with him. I want to fellowship with those who fellowship with God. I couldn’t care less if you have a doctorate in theology or sixty years of life experience. I would rather talk with a fifteen-year-old who has been in the presence of God.

Can You Love Sermons Too Much?

There is so much discussion around books, sermons, and conferences. I’m not against those. After all, I’ve given a significant portion of my life to preaching sermons and writing books and going to conferences. But sometimes I wonder if it’s time to shift our focus.

We have to look at the facts. American Christians consume more sermons and books than any other group in the history of the world, but consider the state of the church. Has the increase in resources led to greater holiness? Greater intimacy with Jesus?

You could argue that the state of our churches would be even worse without the resources. Maybe that’s the case. Or could it be that these resources (and even this article) has the potential of distracting people from the Source itself? Maybe all of these books and sermons about Jesus have actually kept people from directly interacting with him. It may sound blasphemous to suggest our prayer lives may be weakened by all of the consumption of Christian material. Nonetheless, I want to throw it out there.

We live in a time when most people have a difficult time concentrating on anything. We are constantly looking for the quick fix and for faster solutions. So the thought of sitting quietly to meditate on Scripture and praying deeply in silence can be eagerly replaced by listening to a sermon while driving to work. While it’s definitely better than nothing (considering all of the other messages we are bombarded with daily), the point of this article is to say that there is no substitute for being alone with God.

We must learn to be still again.

Something Has to Go

It was simple for Paul. He loved being with Jesus. “To live is Christ, and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21).

“There is literally nothing more important you could do today than to spend meaningful time alone with God.”

Knowing Christ deeply consumed him (Philippians 3:8). There is no substitute for being alone with God. If you don’t have time, you need to quit something to make room. Skip a meal. Cancel a meeting. End some regular commitment. There is literally nothing more important you could do today.

God literally determines whether or not you take another breath. “He himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything” (Acts 17:25). Could anything be more important than meeting with the One who decides if you live through this day? Could anything be better? How can we not make time to be with the Maker of time?

What plans do you have today that you think so important that you would race past the Creator to get to them?

Francis Chan is a pastor in San Francisco and is actively planting churches in the Bay Area.

Originally posted on DesiringGod.org https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/the-greatest-thing-you-could-do-today

If We Love God Most, We Will Love Others Best

Article by Jon Bloom

The most loving thing we can do for others is love God more than we love them. For if we love God most, we will love others best.

I know this sounds like preposterous gobbledygook to an unbeliever. How can you love someone best by loving someone else most? But those who have encountered the living Christ understand what I mean. They know the depth of love and breadth of grace that flows out from them toward others when they themselves are filled with love for God and all he is for them and means to them in Jesus. And they know the comparatively shallow and narrow love they feel toward others when their affection for God is ebbing.

There’s a reason why Jesus said the second greatest commandment is like the first: if we love God with all our heart, we will love our neighbor as ourselves (Matthew 22:37–39). It functions like faith and works; if we truly have the first, the second naturally follows.

But if God is not the love of our life, there is no way that we will truly love our neighbor as ourselves. For we will love ourselves supremely.

He First Loved Us

The reason we will love others best when we love God most is that love in its truest, purest form only comes from God, because God is love (1 John 4:7–8). Love is a fundamental part of his nature. We are only able to love him or anyone else because he first loved us (1 John 4:19). We are only able to give freely to others what we have received freely from him.

And as God’s image-bearers (Genesis 1:26), we are designed to love God and others in the same way that God loves God and others. God, being the most pure, perfect, powerful, and precious entity in existence, must love himself most in order to love everything else best, since everything else is “from him and through him and to him” (Romans 11:36). If God loved something or someone else more than himself he would be violating the first commandment (Exodus 20:3) and the foremost commandment (Matthew 22:37–38). For God to love something or someone more than himself would be inappropriate, perverted, immoral. Like God, we must love him supremely in order to love everything else best.

The Horrible Result of Not Loving God Most

When we (or anything else, if that’s possible) become our supreme love instead of God, love becomes distorted and diseased. Love ends up devolving into whatever we wish for it to mean.

This is a great evil, greater than we often realize. This is the world as we know it: everyone loves in the way that is right in his own eyes. Which of course means that everyone hates in the way that is right in his own eyes. They become supreme “lovers of self” (2 Timothy 3:2) and live “in the passions of [their] flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind,” since they were “children of wrath” (Ephesians 2:3). It is not hard to understand why there is so much confusion and conflict and heartbreak and violence in the world. We live in an anarchy of love resulting in much of the horrifying things we hear in the news.

The Greatest Love Ever Shown

But God, being rich in mercy (Ephesians 2:4), “so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16). The author and perfecter of love, Love himself, stepped into our horrible evil anarchy to redeem us (Romans 5:8), his people, and give us new life (Ephesians 2:5), and transform us from children of wrath back into children of God (John 1:12) who are able to love him supremely and therefore love each other rightly — the way he has loved us.

And how has he loved us? With the greatest love there is, the love that moves one to lay down his life for his friends (John 15:13). But this doesn’t mean that Jesus loved us, his friends, more than his Father. It means that Jesus loved us best because he loved his Father most (John 17:26; Mark 14:36). And “if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 John 4:11).

What May Be Our Most Loving Act Today

So we see that if we love God most, we will love others best.

I find this to be a convicting and uncomfortable truth: How we love others, particularly other Christians, reveals how we love God. The apostle John puts it bluntly: “He who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen (1 John 4:20). Our love for each other is an indicator of the place God is holding in our hearts.

God is very good at designing things this way: our faith is revealed by our works (James 2:18), our creeds are revealed by our deeds (Luke 6:46), and our love for him is revealed by our love for others (1 John 4:20). He makes it very hard for us to fake it. And this is a great kindness (Romans 2:4).

Since the greatest and second greatest commandments are involved in these things, we know they are important to God. So perhaps the best thing we can do today is take an honest, lingering look at the way we love others, allow what we see to have its Philippians 2:12 effect on us, and ask God what he would have us do in response.

We may find that this is the most loving thing we will do for everyone else today.

Article originally posted on desiringgod.org :  https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/if-we-love-god-most-we-will-love-others-best

Jon Bloom (@Bloom_Jon) serves as author, board chair, and co-founder of Desiring God. He is author of three books, Not by Sight, Things Not Seen, and Don’t Follow Your Heart. He and his wife live in the Twin Cities with their five children.

The Problem of Forgiveness

by R.C. Sproul

Forgiveness is a problem for many people due to their misunderstanding of what forgiveness involves and confusion about what forgiveness really is. Part of the issue is that sometimes we are unable to distinguish between forgiveness and feeling forgiven. Sometimes our feelings can get out of sync with the reality of forgiveness.

Once a man came to talk to me about feeling greatly distressed because of his guilt. He said that he had committed a particular sin and had prayed and prayed about it but hadn’t received any relief. He wanted to know what he had to do to experience God’s forgiveness. But since he had confessed his sin and begged God to forgive him, I told him that he needed to ask God to forgive him for a different sin—the sin of arrogance. God says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). When we don’t believe that God has in fact forgiven us when we have confessed our sin, we are calling into question His faithfulness. We are saying that God’s promise cannot be trusted. That is supreme arrogance, so we need to ask God’s forgiveness for our refusing to believe His promise.

There is more to this problem of forgiveness. When we sin, one of the most difficult things for us is accepting free, gracious, merciful forgiveness. We are creatures of pride. We think that God’s forgiveness is fine for other people, but when we do something wrong, we want to make up for it. However, this is absolutely impossible for anyone to do. God requires perfect holiness. Once perfection is lost, we cannot regain it. We are debtors with a debt we cannot pay. This is difficult for us to accept because we want to be able to pay our own way. It’s because of our pride and arrogance, both fruits of our sinfulness, that we refuse to accept the forgiveness of God.

Back to the distinction between forgiveness and feeling forgiven: forgiveness is objective but the feeling of forgiveness is subjective. I can feel forgiven but not be forgiven because I haven’t repented. I can excuse myself when God has not excused me, and that false feeling of forgiveness can lead me astray. But I can also not feel forgiven even when I actually have been forgiven. If God declares that a person is forgiven, that person is in fact forgiven. Our lack of feeling forgiven does not negate the reality of what God has done.

What is the authority in our lives? Our feelings, which are subjective, or the Word of God, which is objective truth? The Christian must live practically each day by the Word of God rather than by his feelings. The issue of forgiveness is not whether we feel forgiven, but whether we have repented. If we confess our sin and ask God for forgiveness through Christ, we can be assured that He forgives us.

Forgiveness is objective but the feeling of forgiveness is subjective.

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Sometimes we don’t forgive ourselves even though God has forgiven us. But who are we to refuse to forgive one whom God has forgiven? What makes us so wicked that God’s forgiveness is not enough to cover our sin? In effect, we’re saying that we’re so evil that even the grace of God can’t help us. No, we’re so proud that we refuse God’s grace.

Now let’s look at what forgiveness is. The Bible teaches that when God forgives us, He forgets our sins. This doesn’t mean He erases them from His memory. It means that He doesn’t hold them against us anymore.

How many times has someone told you that he has forgiven a sin you committed against him, and then, the next time you have a fight, he brings up what you did the last time? That person has, in a sense, rescinded his forgiveness. God doesn’t do that. If I am pardoned by God, it is settled and is never to be brought up again. God puts those sins aside and will never speak of them. However, we often reopen old wounds. We allow them to disturb the relationship. If I have forgiven someone, I should never again mention that sin. Forgiveness means not bringing it up.

There is another issue to look at, and that is our obligation to forgive others who sin against us. If such people confess their sin and repent, it is our moral obligation to forgive. However, if they don’t repent, we are not required to forgive. We may forgive, as Jesus did for those who killed Him (Luke 23:34). But in doing that, Jesus didn’t command that we must always forgive those who don’t repent. You can go to those who have wronged you and tell them they have offended you (see Matt. 18:15). If they repent, you have won them. But you are not called to forgive if they don’t repent. You are not allowed to be bitter or vindictive. You have to be loving, caring, concerned, and compassionate, but you don’t have to forgive. You can still talk about it and seek public vindication.

Here is one last problem related to forgiveness that we deal with often as elders in Christ’s church. A husband or wife commits adultery, repents deeply, and then asks his or her spouse for forgiveness. In such a situation, the offended spouse must forgive the guilty partner. However, that spouse is not obligated to stay married to that partner. The Bible makes a provision for the dissolution of a marriage in the event of adultery. The person is required to treat the repentant person as a brother or sister in Christ but not as a spouse.

Another example is a man stealing from us fifty times in our office and repenting each time. We must forgive him, but we can ask for restitution. We don’t have to keep him in our employ, but we must still treat him as a brother in Christ. This situation is an important practical application of the concept of forgiveness. We can have forgiveness and restored relationships, but that does not necessarily mean there are no lasting consequences for our sin.

Dr. R.C. Sproul was founder of Ligonier Ministries, founding pastor of Saint Andrew's Chapel in Sanford, Fla., and first president of Reformation Bible College. He was author of more than one hundred books, including The Holiness of God.

Link to original article:  https://tabletalkmagazine.com/article/2018/02/the-problem-of-forgiveness/

The One Sure Mark of Christian Maturity

Article by Tim Challies

I suppose we all know that as Christians we are meant to grow up, to mature. We begin as infants in the faith and need to develop into adults. The New Testament writers insist that we must all make this transition from milk to meat, from the children’s table to the grown-up’s feast. And yet even though we are aware that we must go through this maturing process, many of us are prone to measure maturity in the wrong ways. We are easily fooled. This is especially true, I think, in a tradition like the Reformed one which (rightly) places a heavy emphasis on learning and on the facts of the faith.

The Bible is the means God uses to complete us, to finish us, to bring us to maturity.

When Paul writes to Timothy, he talks to him about the nature and purpose of the Bible and says, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). That word complete is related to maturity. Paul says that Timothy, and by extension me and you and all of us, is incomplete, unfinished, and immature. The Bible is the means God uses to complete us, to finish us, to bring us to maturity.

But what does it mean to be a mature Christian? I think we tend to believe that mature Christians are the ones who know a lot of facts about the Bible. Mature Christians are the ones who have their theology down cold. But look what Paul says: “That the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” Paul does not say, “That the man of God may be complete, knowing the books of the Bible in reverse order,” or “That the man of God may be complete, able to explain and define supralapsarianism against infralapsarianism.” He does not say, “That the man of God may be complete, able to provide a structural outline of each of Paul’s epistles.” Those are all good things, but they are not Paul’s emphasis. They may be signs of maturity, but they may also be masks that cover up immaturity.

When Paul talks about completion and maturity, he points to actions, to deeds, to “every good work.” The Bible has the power to mature us, and as we commit ourselves to reading, understanding, and obeying it, we necessarily grow up in the faith. That maturity is displayed in the good works we do more than in the knowledge we recite. And this is exactly what God wants for us—he wants us to be mature and maturing doers of good who delight to do good for others. This emphasis on good deeds is a significant theme in the New Testament (see Ephesians 2:10; Titus 2:14, etc) and the very reason why God saved us.

Spiritual maturity is better displayed in acts than in facts.

This means that spiritual maturity is better displayed in acts than in facts. You can know everything there is to know about theology, you can be a walking systematic theology, you can spend a lifetime training others in seminary, and still be desperately immature. You will remain immature if that knowledge you accumulate does not motivate you to do good for others. The mature Christians are the ones who glorify God by doing good for others, who externalize their knowledge in good deeds.

Of course facts and acts are not entirely unrelated, so this is not a call to grow lax in reading, studying, and understanding the Bible. Not at all! The more you know of the Bible, the more it can teach, reprove, correct, and train you, and in that way shape your actions and cause you to do the best deeds in the best way for the best reason. More knowledge of God through his Word ought to lead to more and better service to others.

But in the final analysis, Christ lived and died so he could “redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works” (Titus 2:14). Knowledge of God and his Word is good. Knowledge of God and his Word that works itself out in doing what benefits others—there is nothing that glorifies God more than that.

Link to original posting: https://www.challies.com/christian-living/the-one-sure-mark-of-christian-maturity/

Trusting God with Our Children’s Pain

Article by Sarah Walton

I felt a wave of lightheadedness wash over me as I held my three-year-old’s hand. His screams pierced my heart as he fought the nurse’s attempts to insert a PICC line for the upcoming IV treatments. I don’t know if I can do this again, I thought, as the realization hit me that I would have to go through this process three more times this week with my other children.

I never wanted this for my children. In fact, I feared this for my children. All I wanted was to provide for them a normal childhood and to protect them from the hard realities of living in this fallen world as long as I could. I have wrestled with how to process my desire to protect my children from the things that God has chosen to allow. What does God’s love mean for my children when it looks different than perfect health — or even normal health?

The Refiner’s Gracious Fire

What if the very things we fear for our children — and try to meticulously control — turn out to be the avenues that God will use to open their eyes to him? What if God uses the hardest of days (that we tried to avoid) to grow their character and set them on a different, yet eternally rewarding path than we would have chosen for them?

If you are walking a hard road with your child, or are gripped with fear over something that might threaten their comfort and happiness, I’d like to encourage you with some ways that I have seen God use suffering in the lives of my children and our family. He has worked in us in ways that I wouldn’t change even if I could. My children have been touched by the Refiner’s fire and are learning precious lessons in the midst of it.

1. They are learning to endure.

We don’t have to live long to realize that life is hard, and if our children are to follow Christ, it won’t be comfortable and pain-free. But many of us live in a culture where children are catered to, cushioned, and overprotected, often producing entitled, overly anxious, self-absorbed, and fearful kids.

“What if the very things we fear for our children turn out to be avenues that God uses to open their eyes to him?”

Should we do our best to protect our kids from obvious dangers? Yes, of course. But we also need to be careful that we aren’t putting ourselves in the place of God, trying to control everything around them, while thinking that we’re doing them a service by preventing hardship and discomfort from entering their lives. We may be trying to protect them from the very things that will equip them to follow hard after Christ.

Although I would never have chosen for my children to be born into sickness and struggle at such a young age, I have seen how God has used this suffering to teach them to seek him, do hard things, learn to endure, and grow in character along the way (Romans 5:3–4).

2. They are learning to look for God’s faithfulness.

We live in a Christian culture that is soaked in prosperity-gospel teaching and thinking. Kindly, the Lord has allowed circumstances that have challenged that view and opened my children’s young eyes to see his faithfulness in lasting ways. They have had a front-row seat to watch God provide financially for our family in seasons of desperate need. They have experienced the sweet provision of God when gifts were dropped off anonymously on our front step, and when meals have been consistently delivered from our church family.

While they have cried out in their frustration toward the pain, they have learned that Jesus sees their tears and answers their prayers. They have also learned to be grateful for the small things, and to appreciate blessings they would never have appreciated had they not experienced much loss.

Of course, my children still throw tantrums, wish to be normal, and act like typical kids, but as they’ve experienced God’s faithfulness in tangible ways, his presence and provision in the trials have gradually become sweeter.

3. They are learning that sin is more dangerous than pain.

The truth is, pain has a way of tearing down our pretenses and our ability to mask our sin. For me, when my own chronic pain flares, or I feel helpless to help my kids, I’m much quicker to snap at them, gripe about all that I have to do, and blame everyone else for my responses. The pain doesn’t cause my sin; it reveals my sin. The same is true for our kids.

“Through trials, God has helped our family see that suffering is not our main problem — sin is.”TweetShare on Facebook

As our family has endured years of ongoing trials, God has helped us see that suffering is not our main problem — sin is. This is not a pretty process, but it’s been an unexpected blessing as they experience the Refiner’s fire at such a young age. Rather than living their childhood free from pain and ignorant of how deeply sin runs within them, God has used these unexpected trials to strip away the illusive veneer of triviality, revealing their need for a Savior.

What a blessing it is as a Christian parent to see your children begin to grasp that Jesus is the greatest gift, and that the pain they experience now is only temporary when they have the hope of eternity. Though I don’t know for certain the state of each of my children’s hearts, I’m thankful that God is providing many opportunities to sow seeds of the gospel in the fertile soil of their souls.

I Will Not Fear

If you are currently watching your child face hardship of some kind, remember that God loves our children more than we ever could, and he is trustworthy. There is so much to fear in this world, but when we come to fear and trust God more than we fear pain or trust our ability to control life, we will find freedom and peace in our parenting.

As the psalmist said in Psalm 56:3–4, “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me [or my children]?” Let’s be parents who not only pray for the protection of our children, but first and foremost pray that their hearts would turn to Christ, no matter the cost.

Sarah Walton and her husband live in Chicago with their four young children. Sarah blogs at setapart.net and is co-author of the book Hope When It Hurts.

Link to original article:  https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/trusting-god-with-our-childrens-pain