Four Lessons for Same-Sex-Attracted Christians

Satisfied in the Arms of Another

Article by Christopher Asmus

When I began sharing my story, I had no idea how many people like me would come running for help. I am a married man, and a pastor, who experiences same-sex attraction.

Since the first time I wrote about my journey and struggle, I have received hundreds of emails from men and women from all over the world asking essentially the same question: How? How do I practically live — as a follower of Jesus Christ — who experiences homosexual longings for intimacy? How do I deal with the nearly crippling loneliness and hopelessness I feel every day surrounding my sexuality?

As I considered whether to say more, afraid of another wave of messages, my wife, seeing the fear on my face, looked over at me from across the living room, and in a beautiful moment of togetherness, we rehearsed a verse we had remembered for moments like these,

“I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God.” (Acts 20:24)

So, if you are a Christian experiencing same-sex attractions, here are four truths I believe will help you fight well and flourish in your faith in Jesus.

1. The Earth Is Flat

When it comes to sexuality, everyone has fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Or you could say, none is truly “straight,” no not one (Romans 3:10). The Enemy loves to tell Christians who experience SSA that they are uniquely depraved. That God, being cruel, has placed you in a sin struggle that is more difficult than those around you.

As hard as your predicament may seem, you must know that Christ is not calling you to give up or sacrifice any more than anyone else. Sam Allberry reminds us,

Ever since I have been open about my own experiences with homosexuality, a number of Christians have said something like this: “The gospel must be harder for you than it is for me,” as though I have more to give up than they do. But the fact is that the gospel demands everything out of all of us. If someone thinks the gospel has somehow slotted into their life quite easily, without causing any major adjustments to their lifestyle or aspirations, it is likely that they have not really started following Jesus at all. (Is God Anti-Gay?, 10)

As a pastor, I have a front-row view into the sexual brokenness of everyone. Daily, I am reminded that loneliness is not solved by marriage, intimacy is not fulfilled by intercourse, and desire is not satisfied in the arms of another.

Whether gay or straight, married or unmarried, single or dating, everyone lives in some state of sexual and emotional dissatisfaction and unfulfillment. We all are sexually broken. When it comes to sexuality, the earth is flat.

2. It Takes a Village

If you are going to put your SSA to death (Colossians 3:5), then you must know it’s going to take a life-giving, truth-speaking, Christ-seeking community. As Paul Tripp says, “Your walk with God is a community project.”

God has made no lasting provision for your fight against homosexual desires outside of, or apart from, the local church. We reorient our lives around the gospel by gathering regularly with Christian brothers and sisters (Hebrews 10:23–25). The bullets of grace you need to put same-sex attractions to death will come to you through Christ-centered community.

One of the primary ways God will provide the grace you need will be through exercising your gifts (1 Peter 4:10). Personally, I am most prone to fall into sin when I’m bored and have too much energy to pursue lesser things. My temptations are most powerless when I am enlisted and energetically engaged in what God has called me to do.

As you lay your head on the pillow every night as one who has been wrung out in service to Christ, your affections will begin to be transformed until you find life, peace, and identity apart from SSA (Romans 8:5–6). When it comes to putting to death the deeds of the flesh (Romans 8:13), it takes a village.

3. Call in the Cavalry

If you really want to launch an all-out assault on your SSA, call in the cavalry. God’s most potent weapons are harbored in the hearts of those around you. Confess your sins to trusted believers (James 5:16). Confession is like picking up the radio and telling those around you the precise location that needs to be bombed with grace.

Sure, some people may not respond well to your vulnerable confession, but as Spurgeon said, “If any man think low of you, take heart; he does not think low enough.” It’s better to reveal yourself to some, and not be fully embraced by everyone, than to never reveal yourself fully to anyone, and thus never be truly embraced at all.

I suggest you begin by telling a trusted, gospel-soaked friend. If you are too afraid to do it in person, then write a letter. But loved one, we often are much weaker than we suspect. You may be only five minutes away from falling. It’s time to call in the cavalry.

4. Finally Fulfill Your Desires

Fighting your SSA desires is only the beginning. The true work of the Christian is fulfilling them, ultimately and completely.

Our longings, by nature, will not give us peace until after they are fulfilled, and so it’s our duty and delight to see them fulfilled in Jesus Christ (Psalm 107:9). Give yourself completely to satisfying your longings for intimacy, but not in mortal men (for any practicing homosexual can testify their relationship is not ultimately satisfying), but in the immortal man: Christ himself.

John Piper has said, “Theology can conquer biology.” Therefore, roll out of bed for one main purpose: to fall madly in love with Jesus Christ. Read such bright, beautiful, brilliant books on God that your same-sex attractions fade into a shadow of boring irrelevance. Listen to sermons that open your eyes to such grace and gravity that you see God (Matthew 5:8) and the thought of looking anywhere else would be like staring at your shoelaces when you’re at the summit of Everest. Be a grace hound, always hot on a fresh scent of God.

If you are a Christian experiencing same-sex attractions, continually remind yourself that loneliness is solved only in God (Psalm 63:1–2), intimacy is fulfilled only in God (Psalm 63:3–5), and desire is, indeed, satisfied only in the arms of Another (Psalm 63:6–8).

Step Out and Share

Still, you may be thinking, I can never share my struggles with anyone. I am far too familiar with that feeling. It took me twenty years to finally begin sharing my struggle with other believers.

Jesus told us to count the cost before following him (Luke 14:28–33), and opening up about your same-sex attractions may come at a significant cost to you. Bringing your SSA to light will affect you in a thousand different ways, and some of those will be incredibly painful.

But it’s worth it. Christ will be most powerfully displayed in your weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). The Christian walk hits its stride when we actively seek to be seen as less in order that Christ may be seen as more (John 3:30).

To the Christian who experiences same-sex attractions, it is my eager expectation and hope that, as you invite others into this struggle, you will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in your body, whether by life or by death (Philippians 1:20).

Christopher Asmus (@ChrisAsmus) is lead pastor at Vertical Church St. Paul, a new church plant in St. Paul, MN. Christopher and his wife, Alexandria, are happy parents to their two sons, Haddon and McRae.

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/satisfied-in-the-arms-of-another?utm_campaign=Daily+Email&utm_source=hs_email&utm_medium=email&utm_content=66878388&_hsenc=p2ANqtz--XoH1NyKlquh46zZMS3Mk44PQnf4Nx5hNJJjFmU9FLKfWL5jquqoHDzZbjnVNYdme0nK1XL3CE7O8i1FxTE35EjFlUjQ&_hsmi=66878388

Look For the Kindness of the Lord: How to Grow Through Bible Reading

Article by John Piper

God does not stop revealing to us the glory of Christ in his word. He starts at new birth, and he keeps on revealing the glory of Christ. Our new life started with a miracle — and it continues with a miracle.

The ongoing miracle that God works by his Spirit is that we become increasingly like the one we admire and enjoy — him. The apostle Paul writes,

We all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. (2 Corinthians 3:18)

The words “beholding” and “being transformed” are present tense, which means ongoing action — not once for all, but continual. “Beholding the glory of the Lord, we are being transformed.” This is what God does daily as we look to him in his word. It is what he does weekly in the preaching of his word in gathered worship. And it is what, I pray, he is doing right now as you read.

Beware of Growth Schemes

Many Christians, especially newer Christians, long for a method of discipleship that will change them quickly by just following a few clear and doable steps. I would caution you from pressing too hard for such a foolproof method. Such approaches to growth and change often lead to disillusionment, and sometimes to a crisis of faith — why is this not working for me?

God’s way toward growth is more like the watering of a plant, or feeding a baby, than the building of a wall brick by brick with a manual in our hand. When you build a wall that way, you can see every brick put in place, and measure the progress. We hold the brick; we apply the mortar to hold it in place; we place the brick. Voila! Growth! Christian growth is not like that. It’s more organic, less in our control, and usually slower.

Beware of schemes that put things in your control, and promise more than they can deliver.

Long for Spiritual Milk

Consider this picture from 1 Peter 2:2–3: “Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation — if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good.” The picture is of a child growing. At the end of the day, can you see the growth? No. At the end of a week? Not really. But after a year? Yes! Did you control the growth by adding inches and pounds? No. You fed the child. You cleaned the child. You protected the child from harm. And God gave the growth.

Peter tells us to “long for the pure spiritual milk” in the way a baby desires food when he is hungry. In other words, really desire it! Cry out for it. Don’t be quiet till you have it. What is the milk? Two clues. First, Peter had just described the new birth of a baby Christian in 1 Peter 1:22–25. He said that “you have been born again . . . through the living and abiding word of God . . . And this word is the good news that was preached to you.” The life-giving means that God used to create a new creature in Christ — the way he caused the new birth — is the word of God, especially the sweetness of the gospel.

So, when he says two verses later that this Christian should desire the spiritual milk for growth, it is natural to think he is still referring to the word that gave the life in the first place.

How to Read the Bible

The second clue that Peter is thinking about the word when he refers to the milk is in the next verse (1 Peter 2:3): “if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good.” The word “tasted” signals to us that Peter is still thinking about desiring drink. And here the taste of the drink is “that the Lord is good.” The milk that we are to desire for growth is the goodness and kindness of the Lord revealed in his word. Or to put it another way, reading the word with a specific intention to taste the goodness of the Lord as we read.

Peter says the effect of this regular feeding on the spiritual milk of God’s goodness in his word will be to “grow up into salvation.” Our growth will be toward the climax of our total transformation when Christ returns. And in the meantime, there will be real, but incremental, and sometimes slow, growth.

This growth is a miracle and not entirely manageable by us. To be sure, we are not to be passive. But the decisive spiritual work belongs to God.

God Gives the Growth

Jesus told a parable to emphasize this divine work in growth:

“The kingdom of God is as if a man should scatter seed on the ground. He sleeps and rises night and day, and the seed sprouts and grows; he knows not how. The earth produces by itself, first the blade, then the ear, then the full grain in the ear. But when the grain is ripe, at once he puts in the sickle, because the harvest has come.” (Mark 4:26–29)

This parable is about the kingdom of God in the world. But the principle applies to the kingdom of God bringing about growth in the believer. The point of the parable is that, even though we sow seed (as we drink the spiritual milk of God’s kindness in his word), nevertheless, the blade and ear and grain come into being “he knows not how.” It is not in our control. God gives the growth.

Or as Paul said about the growth of faith among the Corinthians, “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth” (1 Corinthians 3:6–7).

John Piper (@JohnPiper) is founder and teacher of desiringGod.org and chancellor of Bethlehem College & Seminary. For 33 years, he served as pastor of Bethlehem Baptist Church, Minneapolis, Minnesota. He is author of more than 50 books, including Desiring God: Meditations of a Christian Hedonist, and most recently Expository Exultation: Christian Preaching as Worship.

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/look-for-the-kindness-of-the-lord?fbclid=IwAR1DacS5LTVJpihH6r6x3sRhcKFaR-iQAHODBXlAyTcxipFY5GEQ6oAEpsE

When the Future Feels Impossible

Article by Vaneetha Rendall Risner

A dear friend of mine is walking through a heartbreaking illness.

When I heard the news, I was shaken. I, who write about suffering, had no words to offer. What could I say anyway? Words seemed inadequate. Trite. Even condescending. How do you encourage someone who is beginning a devastating journey into the unknown?

It takes me a few days to process what’s happening. Our friends are all struggling to process it too. As we pray, we try to remind ourselves of the truths we know. Bedrock truths that have carried us through our own grief. Truths that every Christian can hold onto. Truths that will bear the weight of our sorrow.

He Controls the World

First and foremost, God is sovereign. Nothing that happens to us is a surprise to him. Not one sparrow falls to the ground apart from the Father’s will (Matthew 10:29). On the contrary, everything that we face has been put there with a purpose. We can trust that it is the best for us. And hard as it is to understand, the struggles that land on our doorstep are also for the good of our family, for our friends, for everyone we love, if they love God.

“Everything that we face has been put there with a purpose.”

Yet even as I write this, thinking that our suffering ultimately will be best for our loved ones sounds crazy. Guaranteeing it sounds impossible. But the God of the universe, who keeps the earth spinning on its axis, who tells the ocean to come this far and no farther (Job 38:11), who commands the wind and the waves (Mark 4:41), who clothes the lilies of the field (Matthew 6:28–30), and who has numbered the hairs on our head (Luke 12:7) can ensure that all things work together for good for those who love him (Romans 8:28).

God loves us. He watched his Son die a horrible death, separated from him in his last hours, so that we would never be separated from him. He wants to be with us, to take care of us, and to give us good gifts. How could he, who did not spare his own Son, not give us all things (Romans 8:32)?

He Walks with Us

God has numbered our days. All the days ordained for us were written in his book before one of them came to be (Psalm 139:16). Nothing can cut short our lives. No one will live one second less than God determined before the foundation of the world.

God walks with us every minute of our lives. Jesus says, “Behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matthew 28:20). God says to Joshua, “No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life. Just as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you” (Joshua 1:5). When we walk through the rivers, they will not overwhelm us, because the Lord walks through them with us (Isaiah 43:2).

We never drink the bitter cup or endure any pain without him.

He Will Come Through

“We never drink the bitter cup or endure any pain without him.”

Christ is with us and will give us the comfort and strength we need each day. As Deuteronomy 33:25 assures us, “As your days, so shall your strength be.”

Octavius Winslow, a preacher in England in the 1800’s, reminds us that God gives us more than we need in our hour of suffering. He says, “Has not the Lord always been better than all your troubling anticipations, quelling your fears, reassuring your doubting mind, and hearing you gently and safely through the hour of suffering which you dreaded? Then trust him now! Never, never will he forsake you!”

Yet despite God’s past faithfulness, one of our biggest concerns is whether the Lord will be with us in future trials. John Ross MacDuff, a Scottish contemporary of Winslow, understands this fear. He says,

God does not give grace till the hour of trial comes. But when it does come, the amount of grace and the nature of the special grace required is vouchsafed. My soul, do not dwell with painful apprehension on the future. Do not anticipate coming sorrows; perplexing thyself with the grace needed for future emergencies; tomorrow will bring its promised grace along with tomorrow’s trials . . . and the strength which the hour of trial brings often makes the Christian a wonder to himself!

No Matter What Happens

We don’t need to understand now how we will face the future. God will give us all we need every day we have breath. And when we breathe our last on earth, the Lord will bring us safely to heaven so that we can enjoy him forever.

“We don’t need to understand now how we will face the future.”

One day our eyes will close in death and open to the breathtaking reality that we are in the presence of our Savior. We will feel more alive, more vibrant, more energetic, and more joyful than we ever have on earth. The God whom we have known but never seen will be before us. We will behold his glory with our own eyes, with no distortion or filter. Our souls will be completely at rest and at peace, filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. It will be glorious. That is our hope. Our promise. Our anchor.

These are the truths we as Christians base our lives on. They are sure and unchanging promises, guaranteed by the One who holds the universe. No matter what happens, we will never walk alone.

Vaneetha Rendall Risner is a freelance writer and a regular contributor to Desiring God. She blogs at danceintherain.com, although she doesn’t like rain and has no sense of rhythm. Vaneetha is married to Joel and has two daughters, Katie and Kristi. She and Joel live in Raleigh, North Carolina. Vaneetha is the author of the book The Scars That Have Shaped Me: How God Meets Us in Suffering.

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/when-the-future-feels-impossible

The God Who Is Generous

By Tim Keller

Excerpt from “The Prodigal Prophet”

God’s compassion is not something abstract but con­crete. It plays out not just in his attitude but in his actions toward human beings. It is intriguing that he speaks of these violent, sinful pagans as people “who do not know their right hand from their left” (Jonah 4:11). That is an exceedingly generous way to look at Nineveh! It’s a figure of speech that means they are spiritually blind, they have lost their way, and they haven’t the first clue as to the source of their prob­lems or what to do about them. Obviously, God’s threat to destroy Nineveh shows that this blindness and ignorance is ultimately no excuse for the evil they have done, but it shows remarkable sympathy and understanding.

There are many people who have no idea what they should be living for, or the meaning of their lives, nor have they any guide to tell right from wrong. God looks down at people in that kind of spiritual fog, that spiritual stupidity, and he doesn’t say, “You idi­ots.” When we look at people who have brought trou­ble into their lives by their own foolishness, we say things like “Serves them right” or we mock them on social media: “What kind of imbecile says something like this?” When we see people of the other political party defeated, we just gloat. This is all a way of de­taching ourselves from them. We distance ourselves from them partly out of pride and partly because we don’t want their unhappiness to be ours. God doesn’t do that. Real compassion, the voluntary attachment of our heart to others, means the sadness of their con­dition makes us sad; it affects us. That is deeply un­comfortable, but it is the character of compassion.

There are many people who have no idea what they should be living for, or the meaning of their lives, nor have they any guide to tell right from wrong.

God’s evident generosity of spirit toward the city could not be a greater indictment of Jonah’s ungenerous narrowness, what John Calvin calls his greatest sin, namely that he was “very inhuman” in his attitude to­ward Nineveh.

“They Don’t Know What They Are Doing”

If you are acquainted at all with the New Testament, it is impossible to read about this generous God with­out remembering Jesus. God is saying to Jonah, “I am weeping and grieving over this city — why aren’t you? If you are my prophet, why don’t you have my compas­sion?” Jonah did not weep over the city, but Jesus, the true prophet, did.

Jesus was riding into Jerusalem on the last week of his life. He knew he would suffer at the hands of the leaders and the mob of this city, but instead of being full of wrath or absorbed with self-pity, like Jonah, when he “saw the city, he wept over it and said, ‘If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace — but now it is hidden from your eyes . . . because you did not recognize the time of God’s coming to you’” (Luke 19:41– 2:44). “Jerusa­lem, Jerusalem . . . how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing” (Luke 13:34).

On the cross, Jesus cried out, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing,” (Luke 23:34). Jesus is saying, “Father, they are torturing and killing me. They are denying and betraying me. But none of them, not even the Pharisees, really completely understand what they are doing.” We can only look in wonder on such a heart. He does not say they are not guilty of wrongdoing. They are — that is why they need forgiveness. Yet Jesus is also remembering that they are confused, somewhat clueless, and not really able to recognize the horror of what they are doing. Here is a perfect heart — perfect in generous love — not excusing, not harshly condemning. He is the weeping God of Jonah 4 in human form.

Over a century ago the great Princeton theologian B. B. Warfield wrote a remarkable scholarly essay called “The Emotional Life of Our Lord,” where he considered every recorded instance in the gospels that described the emotions of Christ. He concluded that by far the most typical statement of Jesus’s emotional life was the phrase “he was moved with compassion,” a Greek phrase that literally means he was moved from the depths of his being. The Bible records Jesus Christ weeping twenty times for every one time it notes that he laughs. He was a man of sorrows, and not because he was naturally depressive. No, he had enormous joy in the Holy Spirit and in his Father (cf. Luke 10:21), and yet he grieved far more than he laughed because his compassion connected him with us. Our sadness makes him sad; our pain brings him pain.

By far the most typical statement of Jesus’s emotional life was the phrase “he was moved with compassion.”

Jesus is the prophet Jonah should have been. Yet, of course, he is infinitely more than that. Jesus did not merely weep for us; he died for us. Jonah went outside the city, hoping to witness its condemnation, but Jesus Christ went outside the city to die on a cross to ac­complish its salvation.

Here God says he is grieving over Nineveh, which means he is letting the evil of the city weigh on him. In some mysterious sense, he is suffering because of its sin. When God came into the world in Jesus Christ and went to the cross, however, he didn’t experience only emotional pain but every kind of pain in un­imaginable dimensions. The agonizing physical pain of the crucifixion included torture, slow suffocation, and excruciating death. Even beyond that, when Jesus hung on the cross, he underwent the infinite and most unfathomable pain of all — separation from God and all love, eternal alienation, the wages of sin. He did it all for us, out of his unimaginable compassion.

Reprinted from THE PRODIGAL PROPHET: Jonah and the Mystery of God’s Mercy, by Timothy Keller. Published on October 2, 2018 by Viking, an imprint of the Penguin Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. Copyright © Timothy Keller, 2018.

Posted at: https://medium.com/redeemer-city-to-city/the-god-who-is-generous-7e83d26406f1

God of the Besieged

Article by Todd Stryd

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about “helplessness.” Or, you might say I’ve been pondering the different ways in which we find ourselves “helpless” in this life. For example, I am acutely aware of my helplessness as I watch my son learn the subtleties of playing defense in basketball. For myself, I notice how helpless I am to stop my hairline from receding. On a more global scale, I feel helpless as I watch all manner of ecological or political foolishness. But though I notice things like these from time to time, as a counselor, helplessness is something that I see and feel on a daily basis.

In a way, I’ve resigned myself to it. Helplessness is continually present in the counseling room because we are often powerless to determine the outcome of our problems. Whether it’s the loss of a job, a wayward child, the death of a loved one, chronic pain, being marginalized, receiving a diagnosis of schizophrenia, or attempting to reconcile with an estranged family member—our ability to accomplish our ends, alleviate our suffering, or change our situations can be extremely limited.

Scripture speaks to this. It validates our lack of control and even admonishes us to not assume the certainty of our plans or abilities (see Psalm 103:14, James 4:13-17, and Proverbs 19:21). In light of this, we could be tempted to adopt a posture of fatalism and hopelessness. But in the wisdom of God, helplessness does not lead to hopelessness, and powerlessness does not lead to fatalism. Though Scripture speaks of our limitations and utter dependence as creatures, it simultaneously proclaims God’s power and love. It is God’s power to act and his love for his people within their helplessness that mingles hope with helplessness.

Psalm 31:21 wonderfully captures this relationship:

Blessed be the Lord, for he has wondrously shown his steadfast love to me
when I was in a besieged city.

The imagery used by the psalmist in this verse is that of an extremely dire circumstance: the besieging of a city. It is the perfect illustration of helplessness because a besieged city is surrounded by an attacking enemy and cut off from all resources. There is no escape and no control—the only thing to do is wait. But note that while the setting is ominous, the focal point of the verse is positive, even uplifting. It speaks of God as the one who wondrously shows his “steadfast love” to his people when they are in a place of utter helplessness. So though besieged and helpless, the psalmist was not hopeless. Paul proposes the same thing in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 and then again in Romans 8:35-39: Because of the love of God we do not lose heart, for nothing can separate us from the love of Christ.

In counseling ministry, this reality plays out every day. Sometimes the helplessness that I feel is due to a situation that I know is impossible to fix or change. Other times, the helplessness I feel is due to the complexity of the problem in front of me and I’m not actually sure how to help. Or, I experience helplessness when I know exactly what needs to happen, but I am powerless to bring it about for the person.

While the helplessness I feel may be more or less pronounced, more or less devastating, more or less urgent, in all cases, my hope as a helper, and the hope of those I am helping rests in the God who shows his steadfast love while we are helpless. Psalm 31:21 teaches me to humbly accept my limitations in ministry to suffering, struggling people. In light of this I do not lose hope, for our God is the God of the besieged, the God who is a hope for the helpless.

Posted at: https://www.ccef.org/resources/blog/god-of-the-besieged?fbclid=IwAR33_u8T237McT8Da-OvwDb5sWjJWRquuxf3xCByn1NYUeiuZxA7v9NFOFc

Psalm 121: What it Means That Yahweh is Your Guardian

Article by Jason DeRouchie

Psalm 121 is a treasure of promise for the suffering believer, whose “help comes from the Lord ” (verse 2). After personally celebrating Yahweh’s guardianship in verses 1–2, the psalmist turns to give assurance to others in verses 3–8. He declares the nature of God’s guarding role in verse 3–4: “He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.”

The Perseverance of the Saints

I was surprised to find that the word combination depicting the stumbling step in verse 3 is never used in Scripture of physical falling. Rather, all four of its other occurrences employ it figuratively for someone who is (or anticipated being) overcome by divine judgment (Deuteronomy 32:35), personal sin or weakness (Psalm 38:16[17]), or enemy oppression (Psalm 66:9; 94:18). When the psalmist declared, therefore, “He will not allow your foot to slip,” he was most likely speaking of the perseverance of the saints.

The psalmist is not promising the absence of pain or even failure. But he is promising that, amidst seas of adversity, the elect will remain upheld, not because of their own doing, but because of the preserving hand of God. No one can snatch God’s sheep out of his hand (John 10:27–30), and the one who has justified will never again condemn (Romans 8:33–34). What mercy! What promise! The sure confidence we have today that we will remain with God tomorrow is God himself. Thank him. Remain dependent on him. Plead for his sustaining grace.

He Watches Over Our Souls

Along with ensuring our perseverance (verse 3a), the Lord ’s guardianship also means he is constantly watching over our souls (verses 3b–4). The Hebrew of verse 4 suggests a development from what precedes. Whereas verse 3 suggests “your Guardian” will not slumber now, verse 4 stresses “Israel’s Guardian” will never slumber nor sleep. God “gives to his beloved sleep” (Psalm 127:2), and we are able to rest only because we know God never does. “The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary” (Isaiah 40:28). Yahweh is always awake, always aware, and always watching over his children.

Do not put your hope today in yourself, for were it not for God, you would surely slip. But because of his ever-sustaining mercy, your faith will remain. As asserted in Psalm 94:16–18: “Who stands up for me against evil doers? If Yahweh had not been my help, my soul would soon have lived in the land of silence. When I thought, ‘My foot slips,’ your steadfast love, O Yahweh, held me up.”

It is the steadfast love of the Lord that sustains. It never ceases but it is replenished every dawn (Lamentations 3:22–23).

Look to Your Guardian

Whether your sleepless nights are filled with tears and prayers, diaper changing, or paper writing, God is with you with all the energy and grace you need. Don’t forget him. Look to him at any hour –– in the light or in the night. Yahweh’s guardianship means that he ensures our perseverance. He constantly watches over his own.

Jason DeRouchie is the Associate Professor of Old Testament at Bethlehem College and Seminary. He's also the editor and contributer to What the Old Testament Authors Really Cared About (Kregel: forthcoming 2012) and co-author of A Modern Grammar for Biblical Hebrew (B&H Academic, 2009).

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/psalm-121-what-it-means-that-yahweh-is-your-guardian

Momentary Obedience, Forever Honor

Article by Tim Challies

We have looked at the sweet blessings God promises to those who heed the fifth commandment and we have looked at the terrible judgments he promises to those who do not. We have seen that children have a lifelong duty of honor toward their parents. But while we have learned why we ought to honor our parents, we have not yet considered how. Our question for today is this: How do we show honor to our parents, especially when we are adults? Today we will arrive at an early answer sufficient to begin to direct us. In a future article we will look for help from others to find specific, concrete ways we can extend honor.

Honor and Obey

In both descriptions of the Ten Commandments—those found in Exodus and Deuteronomy—, God commands children to “honor your father and your mother.” There is not a word about obedience. Yet when we read the applications of the commandment scattered throughout the Bible, we see obedience as a key component of the honor children owe their parents. This raises a question: Is obedience to parents permanent or is it temporary? Does honor always require obedience? If I want to honor my parents do I need to continue obeying them throughout my life? To answer these questions we need to examine honor and obedience, looking for what makes them similar and what distinguishes them.

Obey

What the fifth commandment does not require is as important as what it does require. The fifth commandment is not “Obey your father and your mother.” Rather, it is “Honor your father and your mother.” Still, it is clear the Bible places a great deal of emphasis on children obeying parents. We encounter the language of obedience in many of the interpretations and applications of the fifth commandment. Yet as we dig deeper, we find something interesting: the language of obedience tends to come in passages speaking to young children who are still dependent upon their parents. When we come to passages speaking to adult children, we find a subtle switch to language of respect and provision. Thus obedience is a particular form of honor—a form of honor for young children.

Do it now, do it right, and do it with a happy heart

All children are to honor their parents at all times. But when children are young, honor most often takes the form of obedience. This is why when Paul interprets the fifth commandment to young children (Ephesians 6:1-3 and Colossians 3:20) he says, “Children, obey your parents.” To obey is to submit to the will of a person who rightfully holds a position of authority, to comply with their demands or their requests. It is, as we teach our children, to “do it now, do it right, and do it with a happy heart.” Obedience is a child’s display of honor.

Parents are right to expect and demand obedience of their children and children are right to show honor to their parents through that obedience. It is obedience to parents that trains children to be submissive to every other authority, including God himself. It is under the training and discipline of parents that children are prepared to live orderly lives in this world. John MacArthur says it well: “Children who respect and obey their parents will build a society that is ordered, harmonious, and productive. A generation of undisciplined, disobedient children will produce a society that is chaotic and destructive.”

As it pertains to parents and their young children, obedience is meant to be a temporary measure that lasts as long as children are under the authority of their parents. Childhood is a period of training under the tutelage of parents. Parents force their children to obey so children will learn honor and then spend the rest of their lives honoring parents, teachers, bosses, and governments. A parent’s training in obedience is returned in lifelong honor.

Honor

But what is honor? Biblically, the word honor refers to weight or significance. To honor our parents we are to attach great worth to them and great value to our relationship with them. John Currid explains, “The point is that a child must not take his or her parents lightly, or think lightly of them. They must be regarded with great seriousness and value.” We can learn what honor looks like by examining the passages that describe the judgments befalling those who dishonor their parents. These are the passages from the civil law and wisdom literature we looked at last time: Leviticus 20:9, Proverbs 30:17, and so on.

What do we find? Children who dishonor their parents are rebellious and stubbornly resistant to the discipline that would lead them out of that rebellion. They may be verbally abusive, mocking and cursing their parents. They may even be physically violent toward them. If we turn to the New Testament we find that their dishonor may take the form of refusing to care for their parents or provide for their physical and monetary needs (Mark 7:8-13, 1 Timothy 5:8).

Thus to honor our parents we are to respect and revere them, to speak well of them and to treat them with kindness, gentleness, dignity, and esteem. We are to ensure they are cared for and even to make provision for them when necessary. Dennis Rainey says, “Honor is an attitude accompanied by actions that say to your parents, ‘You are worthy. You have value. You are the person God sovereignly placed in my life.” All of that and much more is bound up in this little word.

Obey Today, Honor Forever

We need to consider why the basic requirement of the fifth commandment is not obedience but honor. I am convinced there are at least two reasons: Eventually we are no longer obligated to obey our parents and, even before then, there are times we cannot or must not obey them. To say it another way, there are times we can disobey our parents while still honoring them.

There comes a time when obeying parents is no longer appropriate.

The end of obedience. There comes a time when obeying parents is no longer appropriate. The task of parents is to raise their children to become independent, to function outside of parental authority. In most cases, the parent-child relationship will be permanently altered at the moment of marriage when “a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife” (Genesis 2:24). As a child becomes independent of his parents he leaves their oversight and authority. He no longer owes obedience in the same way or to the same degree.

The sin of obedience. There may also be occasions when obedience is sinful, such as when parents command their children to sin or when they command their children to disobey God or government. When this happens a child must disobey mom and dad in order to obey a higher authority. Another occasion for acceptable disobedience is when parents demand obedience of their adult children or when their demands for obedience become overbearing or abusive. In such cases the child is under no God-given obligation to obey.

God’s basic command to humanity is not “obey your father and mother” because obedience ends and at times can even be sinful. Instead, God’s command is “honor your father and mother” because honor never ends and is never wrong.

Perfect Honor, Perfect Obedience

We are not without a biblical model of honor and obedience. We see them both perfectly displayed in Jesus. Though he was God, he was born to earthly parents and he willingly, joyfully, perfectly honored and obeyed them both. We see his childhood obedience in Luke 2:51 “And he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them.” We see his honor when, in the moments before his death, he ensured provision for his mother: “When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to his mother, ‘Woman, behold, your son!’ Then he said to the disciple, ‘Behold, your mother!’ And from that hour the disciple took her to his own home” (John 19:26-27).

And just as Jesus honored and obeyed his earthly mother and father, he honored and obeyed his heavenly Father. In all he did he spoke well of his Father, he directed glory to him, he carried out his will. And, of course, he obeyed his Father: “And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:8).

If we want our children to honor and obey us, we must teach them about Jesus.

Without losing a trace of autonomy or dignity, Jesus honored and obeyed. If we want to honor and obey our parents we must learn about Jesus. If we want our children to honor and obey us, we must teach them about Jesus. He, as always, is the example of how to perfectly obey God’s perfect law.

Conclusion

In our next article we will look at matters related to culture to see how culture changes our understanding of honor. Later we will look at some of the hard cases in which giving honor is especially difficult. We will also dig up some practical helps to show even more clearly how we can honor our parents. And, of course, we will need to consider how we, as parents, can ensure we are worthy of honor.

Let’s end on a happy note. We know there are two great blessings wrapped up in honoring our parents: A long life and a good life. If we dig a little deeper into the New Testament we find there is one more great blessing. “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord” (Colossians 3:20). Our honor makes God happy. Why? Because in honoring our parents we are honoring the God who gave us our parents. So why not take some time today to consider how you can honor your parents. After all, your honor toward your parents pleases and glorifies God.

Posted at: https://www.challies.com/articles/momentary-obedience-forever-honor/

12 Rules for Speaking Life-Giving Words

By Juan Sanchez

The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,
but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.
The lips of the righteous feed many,
but fools die for lack of sense.
Proverbs 10:11, 21

At a board meeting I was at some time ago, the chairman asked the board members what we had been reading. One of the brothers was reading Scottish Puritans: Select Biographies. He shared with us James Fraser’s 12 rules for ordering his conversations.

In God’s providence, I was preaching through Proverbs. And that next Sunday, I was actually preaching a sermon titled, “Taming the Tongue.” The counsel from Fraser’s book was so helpful, I used it to apply the sermon to ourselves.

Sadly, we live in a culture–and I’m talking about the Christian culture–where we need to remind ourselves of such heart-exposing, conscience-convicting, wisdom-providing counsel.

Let me encourage us then in this way: before we post anything on social media, before we send an email, before we respond to another brother or sister, let us review these 12 rules and choose to speak life-giving words. I’ve updated the language and added applicable Proverbs.

You may find these 12 rules in the Memoirs of the Reverend James Fraser of Brea, Scotland 1798.

1st Rule: Speak nothing sinful

This includes lying, cursing, scolding, backbiting, gossiping, slandering – anything that dishonors God or neighbor.

• 13:3, “The one who guards his mouth protects his life; the one who opens his lips invites his own ruin.”

2nd Rule: Speak no idle words

Will what I speak profit or is it vain and empty?

• 25:11, “A word spoken at the right time is like gold apples in silver settings.”

3rd Rule: Speak not much

• 10:19, “When there are many words, sin is unavoidable, but the one who controls his lips is prudent.”

• 17:27-28, “The one who has knowledge restrains his words, and one who keeps a cool head is a person of understanding. Even a fool is considered wise when he keeps silent—discerning, when he seals his lips.”

4th Rule: Speak soberly both as to matter and to manner

Don’t be loud and obnoxious.

• 27:14, “If one blesses his neighbor with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be counted as a curse to him.”

5th Rule: Speak not rashly or hastily

• 29:20, “Do you see someone who speaks too soon? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”

6th Rule: Speak weightily, seriously

• 26:18-19, “Like a madman who throws flaming darts and deadly arrows, so is the person who deceives his neighbor and says, “I was only joking!’”

7th Rule: Speak in Faith

Do you know and believe what you’re saying?

• 12:22, “Lying lips are detestable to the Lord, but faithful people are his delight.”

8th Rule: Speak Prayerfully

Have you prayed about what you’ll say?

• 15:29, “The Lord is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.”

9th Rule: Speak timely and purposefully

• 15:23, “A person takes joy in giving an answer; and a timely word—how good that is!”

10th Rule: Speak in Fear

Keep a bridle in your mouth.

• 8:13, “To fear the Lord is to hate evil. I hate arrogant pride, evil conduct, and perverse speech.”

11th Rule: Do not let your neighbors’ faults be the subject of your talk, even if true

• 16:24, “Pleasant words are a honeycomb: sweet to the taste and health to the body.”

12th Rule: Speak not of yourself or your worth

• 16:18, “Pride comes before destruction, and an arrogant spirit before a fall.”

Juan R. Sanchez (@manorjuan) is the husband to Jeanine, father to five daughters, senior pastor of High Pointe Baptist Church, Austin, Texas, and author of Seven Dangers Facing Your Church.

Article posted at : https://factsandtrends.net/2018/10/23/12-rules-for-speaking-life-giving-words/

Psalm 119: The Life-Giving Power of the Word

Article by Jason Meyer

Psalm 119:25,

My soul clings to the dust; give me life according to your word!

Have you ever felt something of a schizophrenic relationship to the Bible? At times our hearts are alive to the word of God, while at other times our hearts feel dull and almost dead. This is not merely a frustrating dynamic; it is a fearful condition.

But we find a kindred spirit in a surprising place: Psalm 119.

I say “surprising” because Psalm 119 is a poem of love for the word of God. Going here with our problem seems like a person struggling with singleness going to a wedding celebration! Help, however, comes in the stanza devoted to the Hebrew letter daleth (Psalm 119:25–32).

The Struggle of Dust

The psalmist cries out in anguish that his “soul melts away for sorrow” (Psalm 119:28). His struggle, however, is not simply sorrow. The psalmist confesses that his soul “clings to the dust” (Psalm 119:25). “Dust” here is not a generic metaphorical way of saying that he is struggling. It is a pointed theological reminder of the brokenness that comes from humanity’s fallen state. This word for dust appears as part of God’s pronouncement of curse upon the human race: “till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return” (Genesis 3:19). The psalmist, like us, finds himself struggling with the effects that flow from his own fallen, broken state.

But the fall is not the final word. We can find hope to delight in God again, even in a fallen world. This stanza opens with the psalmist “clinging to the dust,” but it ends with the psalmist running in the way of God’s commandments because God has enlarged his heart (Psalm 119:32).

From Clinging to Dust to Running to God

So how can we move from clinging to running?

The answer lies in the life-giving power of God’s word. The opening verse (verse 25) consists of both a confession and a prayer: “my soul clings to the dust” (confession), “give me life according to your word” (prayer). The same structure is seen in verse 28: “My soul melts away for sorrow” (confession); “strengthen me according to your word” (prayer).

Understanding this answer requires us to move both backwards and forwards in the Bible.

First, overhearing the psalmist pray for God to give life to dust takes us back to Genesis 2:7. “Then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a livingcreature.”

Second, God’s breath of life shows up again in 2 Timothy 3:16 in connection with the word of God because “all Scripture is breathed-out by God.”

When We Read the Bible

These connections help us see that now God breathes his breath of life into a book, not directly into us. We breathe in that breath of life when we read the Bible.

It seems almost counterintuitive, but when we wrestle with a brokenness that causes us not even to desire the Bible, the solution is to turn to the Bible. This solution is not a vote of confidence in ourselves (as if our reading skills could ever overcome our fallen state); but in the word itself as God’s life-giving breath.

May God move you from clinging to dust to delighting in his Word. May his breath fill up your lungs to run the race of faith.

Jason Meyer is the Assistant Professor of New Testament at Bethlehem College and Seminary. He's the author of The End of the Law (B&H Academic, 2009) and Preaching: A Biblical Theology (forthcoming).

posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/psalm-119-the-life-giving-power-of-the-word

Women, Wage War on a Lustful Heart

Article by Brittany Allen

I sat quietly as prayer requests were shared. Typical answers were offered: busyness, health, etc. Until I heard my own struggle spoken through the words of another woman, and I realized I wasn’t alone. We were both battling a lustful heart.

I thought my promiscuous past was the cause of my strife back then. But over time, women have confided in me regarding their own struggle, most of them being women who grew up attending church.

We’ve been taught to believe lust is a man’s issue, but truly, it’s a human issue.

Lust can make you feel hopeless. Like a worn down beast of burden, we carry the weight of it upon our backs, tarrying further into darkness. Who will save us from this body of death?

Lustful Heart Defined

Lust takes many forms, and its definition goes beyond sexual fantasy. For clarity’s sake, I’m defining it how Baker’s Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology does: “a strong craving or desire, often of a sexual nature.”

Lust starts in the heart, springs forth to our thoughts, and most often results in an action. In Matthew 5:28, Jesus tells us “everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

Men are prone to visually undressing a woman in their mind, though certainly women fall prey to this too. But for most women, lust is less about desiring a man sexually and more about wanting to be desired sexually and emotionally.

Regardless of the shape our lustful thoughts take, they always tempt, and often persuade us to sin outwardly. To battle our lustful heart, we must be equipped to fight, using our minds and our bodies.

Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance. (1 Peter 1:13-15)

We must prepare our minds for action and be obedient to Jesus, striving to be conformed into his image instead of our fleshly passions.

Fight by Renewing Your Mind

If we aren’t striving to renew our mind, we mimic a deer in open season. Eyes wide and body void of response to danger, we stand in the pathway of sexual temptation—and it hits us like an arrow between the eyes. We cannot escape Satan’s “flaming darts” if our minds are too dull to discern the threat (Ephesians 6:16).

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. (Romans 12:2)

We must put off thoughts of our old self and think on things of our new life in Christ. Meditate on the gospel—remember who you were before Jesus called you to himself and praise him for making you a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). When temptation enters your mind, choose to think on things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, excellent, and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8).

We renew our minds by immersing them in God’s Word, seeking him fervently, and praying he would purify our hearts (James 4:8).

Fight by Fleeing

Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. (1 Corinthians 6:18)

To flee is to bolt—to run away from danger. Sexual sin is dangerous. Here are some practical ways to “flee”:

• Go for a walk/run.

• Go for a drive and call someone.

• Run an errand.

• Go to a coffee shop to study.

• Listen to the Bible while doing house or yard work.

• Go to the gym.

Furthermore, we must recognize where we’re tempted most often by our lustful heart, and set boundaries to protect ourselves.

Maybe temptation floods in at night when all is quiet and coffee shops are closed. We might be tempted to yield in order to get some rest. But it’s better to lack sleep than to transgress against God. Instead, we can redirect our mind by accomplishing a task or reading Scripture.

Fight With God’s Word

Though it’s the last thing we want to do when feeling sinful, our greatest need when faced with temptation is God’s Word. Force yourself to focus on a passage of Scripture, and pray for help to abstain from sin. Allowing ourselves to wallow in shame over temptation we face is exactly where Satan wants us. If he can keep us there, we’re more likely to give in.

Keep your Bible on your lap, mind fixed on God, and he will give you grace to fight. He’s not aloof in our struggles. He is near.

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:16)

Draw near to him. He promises mercy in time of need.

Fight With Accountability

There’s lack of transparency regarding lust among women, causing many to feel alone in their struggle. Reaching for help feels paralyzing, and we may fear the response of others.

Truly, we cannot fight this on our own. To overcome lust, we need to share with a godly mentor. This provides accountability and shines a light on sin’s darkness, making it less attractive.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. (James 5:16)

Whether we’re the struggling sister or the one who’s struggle has eased, we must grow in our openness regarding sexual sin. If we don’t, our sister remains isolated and in bondage to lust. But if we speak forth, “Me too. Here’s how I fought it. Let’s fight this together,” we lift our sister up, bearing her burden with her.

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness…Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:1a, 2)

Fight From Freedom

Many believe their lustful heart is unbeatable. Its draw is strong and its lies, sweet to the ears, but any pleasure found in it quickly turns sour.

Sin has the capacity to ruin us, but the born-again believer has a choice. We don’t have to sin. Remember, we are free:

We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin….Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace. (Romans 6:6, 12-14)

While those who remain dead in their sin are still enslaved to it, sin has no dominion over the Christian. We aren’t fighting for freedom; we are those who fight fromfreedom—the freedom Jesus Christ bought for us.

Lust isn’t invincible, nor is it outside of God’s power—and his power lives in you if you are his. So choose to wage war on your lustful heart today. This battle is difficult, but with each step toward victory, temptation will have less and less strength.

Brittany Allen

Brittany Allen is a follower of Christ, wife to James, and Momma to two in Heaven. She exists to bring God glory and prays her writing is an avenue for that. She longs to help other women see Jesus as their ultimate Treasure. Find her writing on her blog at brittleeallen.com and follow her on Instagramand Twitter.

posted at: https://unlockingthebible.org/2018/10/women-wage-war-lustful-heart/