Why God's Kindness Leads to Repentance

Article by Michael Card

What we thought would be a routine procedure dragged out to three days in the hospital. The surgeon was amazingly kind, as were the nurses who meticulously cared for us. On the second day, when I began to realize that we might have a longer stay ahead, I went down to the store for some “possibles” we would need.

When I filed into the checkout line, there was a woman ahead of me with as many items in her hands as I had. She smiled and said, “Why don’t you go ahead of me.” Little did she know the minefield she had just stepped into.

“Oh, I couldn’t do that,” I said. “My mother didn’t raise me to break in line, and what’s more I was always taught to let girls go first,” I said jokingly, but also kind of serious.

She patiently smiled, but insisted again that I go ahead: “I have some questions, and I don’t want you to have to wait on me.”

“But I would be glad to wait,” I said, still trying to be considerate, kind, my mother’s son, and so on.

Then she said something that suddenly brought tears to my eyes. There are tears in my eyes at this moment as I write these words, though I’m not sure I completely understand why.

RECIPROCAL KINDNESS

“Why won’t you let me be kind to you?” she said.

Why wouldn’t I? In my mind, apparently kindness counted only when I did it for someone else. In that small encounter I learned a new lesson. If you truly love hesed as Micah 6:8 says, you should love having it shown to you as much as showing it to others. As Paul says, it’s a pathway, and it can be traveled in more than one way.

Perhaps something like this is in view when Paul asks why we sometimes despise the riches of God’s kindness. Why would we question him in the garden? Why would we refuse to enter the Promised Land? Why would we say no to his extravagant offer of loving us through his Son?

His kindness is a path that leads us to repentance, that leads us to Jesus.

HESED: THE PATH TO REPENTANCE

Paul is not the systematic theologian he is sometimes made out to be. He is a church-planting pastor, overpowered by the grace and mercy of God. Though Paul had been a persecutor of the church, ungrateful, even wicked, Jesus forgave him and enlisted him to become one of its most influential apostles. Paul had become a sure recipient of hesed, and he remained amazed by it for the rest of his life. He offers encouragement and deals with problems in his letters. And like the other New Testament writers, he thinks in Hebrew and writes in Greek.

We do not consult the letters of Paul like a theological answer book. Rather, we go to Paul to find the answers to problems and conflicts in the church and in our lives. That was the original purpose of his writing. He was writing to encourage the young church as it faced impossible obstacles. If he has a theology (and certainly he does), it is what William Lane calls a “task theology.”

To be honest, hesed as we have sought to define it is not prevalent in the writings of Paul. Twice he quotes Old Testament passages but frustratingly stops just before the word hesed appears (Rom 15:910). Scholars cannot even agree on what Greek word he used when he was talking about hesed. Some say agape (love), while others argue for charis (grace).

But understanding hesed is not a matter of settling on one single term. Its semantic range is simply too vast. Grace, mercy, and love are central to Paul’s understanding of God’s free offer of forgiveness. In his writings, they are less technical theological terms and far more about describing the heart of God.

THE KINDNESS OF GOD

There is another term Paul uses that often describes the character of God and belongs in the world of hesed. It is the Greek word chrēstotēs usually translated “kindness” (see Rom 2:42 Cor 6:6Gal 5:22Col 3:12Titus 3:4).1 We have seen that this idea falls close to the center of the semantic range of hesed. The word most often appears in the midst of the “chain sayings” Paul (and Peter) was so fond of. In Ephesians 2:7 Paul speaks about the immeasurable riches of God’s grace being displayed through his kindness (chrēstotēs) to us in Christ Jesus. But two passages in Romans speak most clearly of God’s hesed as Paul seems to understand it.

We are not certain when the church in Rome was founded. There is no attribution to a single apostle. When Paul communicates to the believers in Rome, it is clear they have already been gathering for some time, perhaps as early as AD 40. When he arrives in the city he is greeted by a strong group of the followers of Jesus from an apparently well-established church that demonstrates remarkable hospitality (Acts 28:13- 15). In his letter to the Romans, Paul comments that they are known all over the world (Rom 1:8). But a crisis overshadows the church.

Suetonius wrote about a riot in the city in AD 49 over someone he referred to as Chrestus. It is a slave name that means “good one.” Historians agree that it is, in fact, a garbled form of the name Christos. As a result of the disturbance, Emperor Claudius ordered that all the Jews be banished from the city. This would include Jewish Christians as well. As a result the Roman church was divided. The Jews were sent away, while the Gentile believers remained behind.

From the beginning Jesus had been worshiped in Hebrew as Messiah; then as the remaining Gentiles filled the leadership vacuum he was celebrated in Greek as Kurios, or Lord. In AD 54 Claudius died, and as was the custom his edicts were canceled. The Jews returned to Rome (see Acts 18:2), and tension in the church began to rise. Before the expulsion, leadership was primarily Jewish. In the gap caused by the edict, Gentiles had taken up leadership. They had been shaping the church for five years. This is the central problem Paul is dealing with in the letter to the Romans. There are leadership struggles and disagreements in the body as to who Jesus is and how he should be celebrated. Believers are judging one another and factions are forming.

KINDNESS LEADS TO REPENTANCE

In his letter Paul gives two reasons for writing. First, he has been trying to come to them but has been prevented thus far (Rom 1:1013). Second, he wants to encourage them and be encouraged by them (Rom 1:12). Paul begins in chapter 1 with a discussion of sin. He goes on to encourage the church to not get caught up in the sins of paganism and to also avoid the sin of passing judgment on those who do.

The context of Paul’s allusion to hesed in Romans 2:4 is the previous discussion of sin in the Gentile world. In the opening verses of chapter 2 he is insisting the church, given the pagan environment, must also keep from the sin of being judgmental, for when they judge others they are really judging themselves. In that context he makes an extraordinary statement that relates to the hesed character of God: “Or do you despise the riches of his kindness, restraint, and patience, not recognizing that God’s kindness [chrēstotēs] is intended to lead you to repentance?”

The best motivator to keep the Roman Christians, both Jew and Gentile, from becoming mired in their sinful pagan surroundings, and also to keep them from judging each other in the process, is to remember the revelation of God’s character that goes all the way back to Exodus 34. He is a God of hesed. It is not fear that drives us to him, but rather his unexpected and extraordinary kindness that provides a pathway along which we are drawn to him.

Taken from Inexpressible by Michael Card. Copyright (c) 2018 by Michael Card. Published by InterVarsity Press, Downers Grove, IL. www.ivpress.com

Michael Card has recorded over thirty-one albums, authored or coauthored over twenty-four books, hosted a radio program, and written for a wide range of magazines. A graduate of Western Kentucky University with a bachelor’s and master’s degree in biblical studies, Card also serves as mentor to many younger artists and musicians, teaching courses on the creative process and calling the Christian recording industry into deeper discipleship. Card lives in Tennessee with his wife and four children.

posted at: http://gcdiscipleship.com/2019/01/17/why-gods-kindness-leads-to-repentance/

You Are Not Your Own

Article by Jon Bloom

Your body does not belong to you. Do you believe this? I don’t mean doctrinallybelieve it — if you’re a Christian, you of course believe that “you are not your own” (1 Corinthians 6:19). I mean do you functionally believe this?

It’s not difficult to tell. How you use your body reveals what you believe. It canbe difficult to admit, if we feel exposed by our functional belief. Believe me, I know. I have plenty of functional beliefs that fall short of my official beliefs, in varying degrees at varying times.

“In what part of your life have you functionally forgot that you belong to Jesus?”

The question isn’t an exercise in shaming — for you or for me. It’s an exercise in honest assessment, in reality therapy, and, if needed, in repentance. Which, for Christians, should be just a normal, everyday experience. As Martin Luther famously said, “When our Lord and Master Jesus Christ said ‘Repent,’ he intended that the entire life of believers should be repentance.”

Falling Forward Together

All of us fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). None of us has arrived (Philippians 3:12–13). God knows this far better than we do, and he’s made abundant provision for our shortfalls. Each time we repent — each day, even each hour — Jesus’s substitutionary, atoning death for us cleanses us from allunrighteousness (1 John 1:9). God wants us to live condemnation-free (Romans 8:1) by taking full advantage of his endless supply of forgiving, restoring, encouraging, and empowering grace.

Since all of us redeemed short-fallers are in this fight of faith together, we can keep encouraging and exhorting one another every day to press on towards the Great Goal (Philippians 3:14), so that none of us becomes hardened in deceitful, habitual sin (Hebrews 3:13).

With God’s wonderful grace in mind, we can take a good, honest look at ourselves and ask: do we really believe that we are not our own?

Do You Not Know?

Let’s look at these Spirit-inspired, Paul-authored words in context:

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. (1 Corinthians 6:19–20)

When Paul asked “do you not know,” he was addressing Christians. And he asked the Corinthian Christians this question a lot in this letter (1 Corinthians 3:165:66:2–3915–16199:1324). Now, some Corinthians were probably new believers and perhaps didn’t know. But Paul’s phrasing of the question makes it clear that he was giving a firm reminder to most readers who doctrinally knew, but whose behaviors revealed that they functionally forgot.

More poignantly, they were living in functional unbelief, which was real sin and required real repentance. They knew, and they didn’t.

Who Owns Your Body?

In 1 Corinthians 6:19, Paul was specifically addressing sexual immorality among believers. Just like our society, the Corinthian society had a lot of available, accessible, culturally acceptable, and even encouraged ways to immorally indulge sexually. Very likely, many Corinthian Christians had backgrounds rife with immorality. They had habits of thinking and behaving sexually that still affected and tempted them as Christians. Some, apparently, had been repeatedly “falling short.”

“Our Master bought us with the price of his own infinitely precious life in order to make us free.”

More than this, they were actually rationalizing it with a common adage, “Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food” (1 Corinthians 6:13). In other words, Look, if the body has an appetite for food, we feed it. So, if the body has an appetite for sex, we should “feed” it. Besides, we’re free! Jesus’s sacrifice made all things lawful!(1 Corinthians 6:12).

Paul responded with a frank correction: “The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body” (1 Corinthians 6:13). When we become Christians, our bodies become members or appendages of Christ’s body (1 Corinthians 6:15–17). And the very Spirit of Christ dwells in our bodies as the Spirit used to dwell in Jerusalem’s temple (1 Corinthians 6:19). Implication: every sexually immoral behavior a Christian engages in drags the Lord Jesus Christ into that engagement.

That’s why sexual sin, in particular, is a sin against our own bodies (1 Corinthians 6:18). In Christianity, there is no bifurcation of body and spirit. Both make up the human being. To defile one is to defile the other. Both our bodies and spirits, though still vulnerable to sin and the futile suffering of this age while we wait for our full redemption (Romans 8:23), are nevertheless being redeemed by Jesus and will be raised (1 Corinthians 6:14). So, our bodies must not be given over to sin’s governance (Romans 6:12), because our bodies do not belong to us.

You Were Bought

But is this how we live? Do we knowingly behave with our bodies as if Christ is engaged in our physical actions — all of them? Or do we not (functionally) know?

“Gracious as he is, Jesus must still be our Master, which means we must obey him.”

In describing the ways we are not our own, Paul used the metaphors of a bodily member, which does the will of the head; then a bodily temple, which is animated by the divine Spirit who lives there; then a bond-slave, who does the will of his Master. That’s what Paul meant when he wrote, “for you were bought with a price” (1 Corinthians 6:20).

A bond-slave is not his own person. He has sold himself to someone else. He belongs to someone else. He does not merely do as he pleases. His time is not his own. He is not free to follow the whims of his personal dreams. He is not free to indulge the craving of his appetites as he wishes. He is not his own. He belongs to his Master. This is what a Christian is.

Freed at Great Cost

This bond-slavery of a Christian, however, is like no other — far better than any alternative of autonomy. Our Master bought us with the price of his own infinitely precious life in order to make us “free indeed” (John 8:32–36). What does that mean? It means when he bought us, he freed us from our hell-bound slavery to sin (Romans 6:6). He also bought for us the priceless gift of being adopted by the Father as his very children, which makes us heirs with Jesus of his Father’s kingdom and of infinite wealth (Romans 8:16–17). If that wasn’t enough, Jesus, our Master, both now and in the age to come, serves us beyond our wildest imaginations (Mark 10:45Luke 12:37).

But, gracious as he is, Jesus must still be our Master, which means we must obey him (John 14:15). For our master is whomever or whatever we obey (Romans 6:16).

As Christians, we know this. The question is, do we really know? Is Jesus the Master over our time, expenditures, investments, home size and location, education, career, marital status, parenting, friendships, church involvement, and ministry commitments? If not, we do not (functionally) know what we think we know.

Glorify God in Your Body

We need good, honest self-assessment. What is the Spirit bringing to mind right now? In what part of your life have you functionally forgotten, or better functionally not believed, that you belong to Jesus? What are you stewarding as if it is yours and not God’s? Follow the Spirit’s lead and repent. Your gracious Lord and Master stands with scarred arms wide open to receive, forgive, and cleanse you.

“You and I are not our own. We are Christ’s.”

You and I are not our own. We are Christ’s (1 Corinthians 3:23). In every sense, we are Christ’s — body, mind, and spirit. We are members of Christ’s body, our bodies are Christ’s temple, and we are bond-slaves of Christ, who has made us children of his Father and fellow heirs of his estate — what a Master!

He is only, however, the Master of those who obey him. That’s why it’s crucial that our functional knowing aligns with our doctrinal knowing. Or as Paul said, “You are not your own. . . . So glorify God in your body.”

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/you-are-not-your-own

What To Do When You Are Prayerless

Article by Jon Bloom

Prayerlessness is not fundamentally a discipline problem. At root it’s a faith problem.

Prayer is the native language of faith. John Calvin called prayer the “chief exercise of faith” (quoted in “Enjoying Your Prayer Life,” 12). That’s why when faith is awake and surging in us, prayer doesn’t feel like a burden or an obligation. It feels natural. It’s how faith most instinctively speaks.

Throughout the Bible, faith and prayer are inextricably linked. One of the clearest examples is Jesus’s statement in John 15:7: “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” “Abiding” in Jesus is faith — fully believing his words. Asking whatever you wish is prayer. The Bible tells us to “trust in [God] at all times” (Psalm 62:8), to “[pray] at all times in the Spirit” (Ephesians 6:18), to “believe in God” (John 14:1), and to ask of God (Luke 11:9). Prayer is the chief exercise of faith.

John 15:7 also shows us that God’s word and faith and therefore prayer are inextricably linked. Faith is a response to God’s word: “Faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ” (Romans 10:17). As Tim Keller rightly says, “If God’s words are his personal, active presence [see John 1:1–3 and Isaiah 55:10–11], then to put your trust in God’s words is to put your trust in God” (Prayer: Experiencing Awe and Intimacy with God, 53). So if our trust is in God (in God’s promises — 2 Peter 1:4), and God says if you trust me “ask whatever you wish” (John 15:7), then the natural expression of our faith in God is prayer.

The Primary Cause of Prayerlessness

First, when I say “prayerless,” I don’t mean completely prayerless. I mean relatively prayerless. I mean that we aren’t anywhere close to “pray[ing] without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17). We aren’t communing with God in prayer, so prayer feels like a burdensome, boring, perhaps futile exercise that we rush through in a perfunctory way or avoid. When we do pray, our prayers seem feeble and powerless, which just leads to less praying. We don’t have it in us “to pray and not lose heart” (Luke 18:1).

So what’s wrong?

“Prayer is the chief exercise of faith.”

If prayer is the native language of faith and we’re struggling with prayerlessness, then the first thing we need to do is look for a faith problem. There’s a faith breakdown somewhere and, until we get that fixed, our problem will remain.

How do we fix this? We’ll talk about that in a minute, but first let’s talk about what not to fix first.

The Role of Discipline in Prayer

Often our first attempt at fixing our prayerlessness is to try and be “more disciplined” in prayer. We look at heroes, mentors, and peers who seem to have vibrant, powerful prayer lives and figure the solution might be doing what they do or did. If we get up earlier and use a more effective list or app or acronym we’ll fix our problem. Methods are necessary and beneficial as we’ll see, but “more discipline” is a false hope if faith is the problem.

Think of prayer as a train. Faith is the engine of prayer, God’s promises are the fuel, and discipline is the rails. Prayerlessness is almost always due to a stalled engine. For prayer to get going again, we first need to fire up our faith engine again with fuel from God’s promises.

You see, discipline doesn’t power the train of prayer. Faith powers the train as you trust God’s word. But discipline will guide the train. The rails of planning, structure, and methods are necessary. But the best time to address those is when you’ve stoked your engine, because when faith is firing you want to move forward in prayer and you are more likely to be led by the Spirit to choose the rails that are best for your prayer train.

Help for Fighting Prayerlessness

“Faith is the engine of prayer, God’s promises are the fuel, and discipline is the rails.”

So when we’re prayerless, the first thing we must address is the cause of our faith deficit. Here are a few suggestions for doing that:

1. Recall God’s past grace: I put this first because in my experience, when my faith is ebbing low and I’m not even sure why, remembering how God has been faithful to me in the past primes my faith engine to trust in God’s future grace for whatever is causing my current unbelief. “This I call to mind, and therefore I have hope” (Lamentations 3:21).

2. Find the leak: Where is the leak in your fuel tank? If the fuel of faith is God’s promises, then there is a promise(s) that you are not believing. Look for fears, doubts, indulgent sinful habits, unresolved anger, bitterness, disappointment, etc. Often these don’t take long to find. But sometimes they are tricky because something has tapped into a buried past experience that is still muddled in your mind. If this is the case, ask trusted believers to help you figure it out. But when you identify it, name it. Get it clear.

3. Repent of unbelief: A lack of faith is sin. It’s dishonoring to God whose every word is true (Proverbs 30:5). We must repent of unbelief. But God loves to help our unbelief (Mark 9:24) turn into belief. In fact, sanctification is largely a process of growing towards trusting in the Lord with all our hearts (Proverbs 3:5). Like he did with Thomas, Jesus holds out to us his scarred hands to remind us that our unbelief is paid for and says, “Do not disbelieve, but believe” (John 20:27).

4. Fuel your faith engine with promises: God’s promises are the fuel that fires the engine of faith. Get your eyes off of the focus of your unbelief and get them on the promises that God wants you to believe instead. This is often not as hard as it feels like it’s going to be. It’s amazing how powerful God’s promises are. You can feel completely different in a half hour after recalling God’s past faithfulness and remembering some promises without any change in your circumstances. The difference is believing.

5. Fan your faith engine fire with resources: Here are just a few of many resources that can help you tune your faith engine and build helpful rails for your prayer train:

Enjoy Your Prayer Life”: a short booklet by Michael Reeves that you can read in 30–40 minutes. It’s broken into 14 chapters of a couple pages each, which makes it easy to incorporate into your devotions. I have found this very helpful.

Prayer: Experiencing Awe and Intimacy with God: an excellent new book by Tim Keller that addresses in-depth both engine and rail issues. I’m reading it currently and greatly benefitting.

A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World: this book by Paul Miller has been a strength to me. He compassionately pastors all of us prayer-strugglers and helps us both tune our engines and build helpful rails.

Battling Unbelief: Defeating Sin with Superior Pleasure: this book by John Piper is a wonderful place to fill your tank with promises to fuel your faith engine and will help you fight our most common forms of unbelief.

“Get your eyes off of the focus of your unbelief and onto the promises God wants you to believe.”

Praying in the Closet and in the Spirit” (John Piper, video or audio, 53 min): a great sermon for your engine and your rails.

Prayer as a Way of Walking in Love” (Francis Chan, video or audio, 1 hr): mainly for your engine. I’ve listened to this numerous times.

George Mueller’s Strategy for Showing God” (John Piper, audio, 1 hr, 15 min): mainly for your engine, but some rail help too. I’ve listened to this repeatedly.

The Ministry of Hudson Taylor as Life in Christ” (John Piper, video or audio, 1 hr, 12 min): mainly for your engine. I’ve listened to this repeatedly.

Jon Bloom (@Bloom_Jon) serves as author, board chair, and co-founder of Desiring God. He is author of three books, Not by SightThings Not Seen, and Don’t Follow Your Heart. He and his wife have five children and make their home in the Twin Cities.

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/what-to-do-when-were-prayerless

Cares and Consolations

Article by Mike Emlet, CCEF

What cares and concerns burden you today? What challenges are you facing? Does God seem relevant to them? Do you experience his presence and help in the press of life’s challenges? What happens when anxieties grow within you?

Yesterday, in my Scripture reading, I came to Psalm 94, which contains one of my favorite verses:

When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul. (v. 19)

Or as the NASB puts it, “When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, your consolations delight my soul.” While I want to focus primarily on God’s consolations in this blog, first notice the realism of the psalmist: when the cares of my heart are many, not if. Life in a fallen world is hard, often excruciatingly painful. Christians don’t float above the mess of life, stoically relegating disappointments, trials, and tragedies to some back room of our lives. No, we sow in tears (Psalm 126:5). In the world we face tribulation (John 16:33). We are utterly burdened beyond our strength (2 Cor 1:8). We weep with those who weep (Rom 12:15).

But where do we go when the inescapable cares of our lives are multiplying? We look for and embrace the consolations of God. What are those consolations? It’s helpful to consider both “macro-consolations” and “micro-consolations.” Macro-consolations are foundational truths about God’s character and actions that bring comfort and confidence in the midst of hardships. Micro-consolations are the particular comforts and blessings God tailor-makes for a given day in our lives.

What are macro-consolations that help as fears and anxieties rise within us?

  • God’s power. I am consoled by the fact that even a sparrow cannot fall to the ground apart from God (Matt 10:29). Or as the Heidelberg Catechism Question and Answer #1 notes, “He also watches over me in such a way that not a hair can fall from my head without the will of my Father in heaven.” The One who created and sustains all things by his powerful word (Col 1:16-17) will not drop the ball when it really counts.

  • God’s love. I am consoled that God’s power is directed and animated by his love. Psalm 94:18 highlights that God’s “steadfast love” holds us up. His loyal, faithful, never-ending love that comes to its apex in Jesus Christ. No wonder Paul can exclaim, “He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” (Rom 8:32).

  • God’s wisdom. I am consoled that God knows what he is doing. His powerful love flows in the deep channels of his wisdom. This really is the theme of the book of Job—can I entrust myself to him even when my finite perspective is screaming, “Foul!”

  • God’s presence. I am consoled that he is with me. Perhaps this is the most critical comfort. I am not alone. Sometimes we acknowledge God’s power, love, and wisdom, but we envision him operating at a distance as though he is an absentee father. Yet one of the most precious realties Scripture reveals is that our God is with us. “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me” (Ps 23:4). And this Good Shepherd is with us forever through the presence of his Holy Spirit (Matt 28:20), and one day we will see him face to face (Rev 21:3).

What about micro-consolations? Here it is important to pay attention to the particular grace of Jesus Christ; it is sufficient for the day. In the midst of difficulties, it is often hard to pull back and ask God to give us eyes to see the specific shape of his tender care in a given day. Here were some of my micro-consolations from yesterday: I learned that one of the servers at a coffee shop I often visit attends a Bible study at a nearby church led by one of my colleagues. God kept both my wife and my son (a relatively new driver) safe as they drove separately in the midst of treacherous conditions associated with our first snowstorm. A friend with a four-wheel drive vehicle picked me up after I was stranded near the coffee shop. I enjoyed the antics of our labradoodle in the snow. I had a warm bed to sleep in. And there were many more ways I tangibly experienced the fresh mercies of Christ that day.

God promises in Jeremiah 31:25, “For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.” What are the cares of your heart today? Let your anxiety serve as a pivot point, turning you to your Father who pours out his many consolations in your time of need.

posted at: https://www.ccef.org/resources/blog/cares-and-consolations?mc_cid=89235bded9&mc_eid=90be5e29a6

5 Sure Fire Ways to Motivate Your Child to Use Porn

Article by Rick Thomas

Before I get into five surefire ways to motivate your child to use pornography, let me establish two critical points. The first is that no parent wants their child to become involved in pornography. We all agree on this.

The problem for many of us is that we do not understand the insidious allurement of pornography or how our behavior as parents, though unintentional, can help shape a child to crave something that can lead him to a lifetime of slavery.

There are always unintended consequences of our actions. We can’t act one way, good or bad, and expect our efforts to have no unintended consequences. Like a rock dropped into a lake, there will always be a ripple effect on our attitudes and our actions.

Secondly, pornography for a man is not primarily about the physicality of a woman. A woman’s appearance is an external magnet for the eye to enjoy, but the more significant problem for the man are the cravings of his heart.

Pornography is first and foremost about the theater of the mind where the man can enter into his virtual world and be king for a day, or in this case, king for a few minutes as he satisfies his mind with the “risk-free intrigue” of his cyber conquests.

Porn is a secret world that resides in the heart. It is lust, which feeds itself while in the darkness of a person’s mind. This reality makes what we do as parents all the more important because the mind of a child is not altogether discernible.

But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. – James 1:14-15

The seeds of lust can be planted in the mind of a child years before he or she is old enough to act out on what has been growing inside the heart.

The continuum of being lured and enticed by sin, to desiring and conceiving sin, does not have to happen in a rapid sequence. It can take years for this “sinful sequence” to bring sin and death to a person’s life.

In most cases, the allurement and enticement of the porn addict begin in his mind while still a child. This early and unintentional training has been a consistent pattern I have seen in counseling. A child can be in “porn training” long before there is an awareness from the child or the parents.

Non-Romantic Marriage

#1 – Porn Training – Only certain kinds of women are porn-worthy.

The Christian home should be a sexual home. God said sex was good and His first couple was not ashamed about their unique sexualities. It was only when sin entered their world that people became twisted about sex and sexuality.

One of the most significant unintended consequences of the non-romantic marriage is how it communicates that certain kinds of individuals are not “porn-worthy.” Before your mouth completely hits the floor, let me explain.

A significant characteristic of the “porn trained mind” is how some people are worthy to be lusted after, and others are not worthy. We all know who is worth our lust-filled attention.

Women certainly know what can draw the attention of a man. This awareness is why so many of them obsess over how they look, how much they weigh, what they wear, and the horror of growing old.

Though they would not connect this as being porn-worthy, and they shouldn’t, many of them want to be worthy of their husband’s attention: they want their husbands to desire them. While this is not wrong, it can be deadly, especially in a marriage where the husband does not desire his wife.

A husband who does not romantically pursue his wife can send a message to his children that she is not worthy of being pursued. She does not fit his criteria. She is not attractive to him.

Couple this with filling the child’s mind with sensual media like television, movies, and the Internet, it begins to establish a kind of “beauty” that is worthy of a person’s gaze—a beauty the Bible does not exalt.

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. – 1 Peter 2:3-4

An effective way to highlight biblical beauty is for the husband to pursue his wife. Lots of hugging and kissing between the husband and wife can establish biblical beauty for the child. Holding hands, dancing in the living room, hugging for extended periods, and smooching in front of the kids are beautiful examples of who and what is worthy of a man’s love.

Instant Gratification

#2 – Porn Training – Cyber women are downloadable and extinguishable.

It’s a bad idea to give a child whatever he wants. This parenting strategy makes him the perfect candidate for porn training. An integral characteristic of the pornographer is the immediate accessibility and extinguishability of the cyber girl.

A child who receives the desires of his heart when and how he wants them met is set up for a lifetime of instant gratification. When children run the home by easily persuading their parents to give them the desires of their hearts, there is virtually nothing to stop them from getting into porn if the opportunity arises, and the opportunity will arise.

According to Covenant Eyes (CE), porn addiction owns fifty percent of all Christian men and twenty percent of all Christian women. CE also says global porn revenues are down by half due to the amount of free porn online.

Porn is exponentially easier to access than it was just ten years ago. All a person needs to enjoy porn is a heart that lusts and access to the ubiquitous web.

If the child is set up to get his selfish desires met, it won’t be hard for him to be allured by porn. Instant gratification in a child breeds instant gratification when they are adults. We’re hiding our heads in the sand to think we can meet all the desires of our children’s hearts and expect them not to be that way when they are adults.

Non-Communicative Couples

#3 – Porn Training – Married couples communicate less and less, a requirement for porn enjoyment.

One of the common complaints I hear from couples in marriage counseling is the couple’s lack of communication; they hardly talk to each other. If they do talk, it’s usually about family events, mutual transactions, and marital business.

Non-communication is a prerequisite for the “porn trainee” because viewing porn is not a verbal endeavor. Pornography is enjoyment for the twisted heart that does not require verbal interaction.

Non-communicative parents train their children to devalue words, which also teaches them to devalue the opposite sex. A man who does not talk to his wife is sending a loud message–she is not worthy of my words.

Nothing devalues a woman more than pornography. The female is objectified only to be used slavishly to satisfy the putrid mind of a man. Talking is not part of that scenario.

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. – Ephesians 4:29

Husbands, your children need to see the value you give to your wife by giving her your best words throughout your day. Those are words that build up, cherish, nourish, and adore your wife. Show the value you place on the woman you married. Exalt her in the minds of your children.

Talking well is not only valuing the person, but it’s exalting the use of words. The purpose of words is one of the most influential ways the Lord builds us up.

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work. – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

No Consequences for Actions

#4 – Porn Training – Teaches a false confidence through a risk-free relationship.

A child who does not have to pay for what he has done wrong will learn how to get away with anything. No consequences for actions is the kind of thing that gives a porn addict a false confidence in a “risk-free” virtual environment.

Children need a comprehensive view of love, which means appropriate discipline when they do wrong (Hebrews 12:6). The spoiled child who suffers little consequences in life will have a low regard for rules and authority.

Porn has no rules, and it’s a low-risk habit. It doesn’t take much to do porn. It’s not like robbing a bank. A child who knows he can get away with things is easy prey for porn’s allurements.

Biblical discipline is a matter of respect and honor for God and His Word. There are rights and wrongs in God’s world. The porn addict does not have this kind of respect. The lines are blurred; a reality for him that did not begin when he first viewed pornography.

Many porn addicts have a low view of the law of God. They do not care because they have not been made to care. One of the ways you can discern respect and honor in your child is how he respects and honors his siblings or his mother.

Typically, a child will disregard his mother more than he will his dad. When children do this, they are transgressing the boundaries of honor, respect, kindness, and biblical love–all prerequisites for using porn.

Critical Community in the Home

#5 – Porn Training – Criticism and anger are the most common ways we devalue others.

Is your home a place of encouragement, praise, affirmation, and love or a place of frustration, impatience, criticalness, and self-centeredness? The porn world is a “refuge” where people go to escape the sadness of their lives. It’s a place where the addict can obtain personal satisfaction for his unsatisfying life.

A child is affected more by his home life than any other place on earth. Even the church cannot accomplish what the home can. If the home is not a shelter of encouragement, your child will be tempted to find refuge somewhere else. Porn is always beckoning the sad soul.

Porn will never criticize, condemn, admonish, discourage, or disappoint: these are the twisted lies of Satan. Porn “builds up” the hurting soul. All the addict needs to do is tweak his conscience to make it okay for his mind to do porn (Romans 2:14-15).

Once his conscience is appropriately hardened, he is home free–according to his self-deception (Hebrews 3:7). The best antidote for this kind of twisted thinking is to create a culture of encouragement in the home.

The Porn Trained Child

Porn training happens by abdication. Children are responders, and they will respond to what the parents give them. Their hearts are like open buckets, longing for their parents to fill them. It is the parent’s joy and privilege to cooperate with the Lord in directing the child to Him.

  1. Parenting well does not mean your child is home free.

  2. Poor parenting does not mean your child is predetermined to be bad.

A parent’s behavior does not determine the morality of the child; the grace of God does. However, your responsibility to biblically steward your children does matter. You should not presume on God’s grace (Psalm 19:13). The question for you to answer is, “How do I need to change to cooperate with the Lord in the parenting of my child?”

Posted at: https://rickthomas.net/five-sure-fire-ways-to-motivate-your-child-to-use-porn/?fbclid=IwAR3IRGu6BT8RVmHZyeAtzi1PMAZTUVsVkNI1eX-3olQO-PQFFCiFVy_cWao


Grooming the Next Generation

Article by Greg Morse

The American Psychological Association recently contributed its thoughts on traditional masculinity, telling us that it’s mainly a semi-harmful social construct. This week, Gillette has added its two cents on “toxic” masculinity in a now-viral advertisement. The main point: men must hold other men accountable “in ways big and small,” especially as it pertains to sexual harassment and bullying. This is important because, apart from the incentive of selling shaving products, the boys watching today will be the men of tomorrow.

Backlash has ensued. The commercial has almost half a million likes with twice as many dislikes. Many decry the characterization that men today are sexual harassers who sit around at barbecues and let kids beat each other up, mumbling between beers that “boys will be boys.” The commercial, some say, promotes a view that all men are rapists and bullies.

Others heard it as yet another call to be less rugged, more domesticated, more conceding to the feminism of our time. Another attempt to paint us as unstable in order to take away sharp objects. The virtue that men and women have equal value has devolved into the vice that pretends men and women are the same.

But many embrace the message because it calls out a strain of men that do exist in our society — brutes who use their strength and power toward corrupt ends. Whether that end entails touching a female inappropriately or harassing someone smaller, God’s people — like God himself —will confront such violence and abuse.

Narrowly speaking, the message that seeks to protect our women and children deserves our hearty amen, regardless of whether Balaam speaks it. We too stand firmly, unequivocally against that imposter called brutality. But this is one perversion today that is profitable to stand publicly against. Another distortion, less financially beneficial, has slipped quietly under the radar.

When Men Wore Pants

This less-popular strain of toxic masculinity was documented a decade ago by Dockers in its Man-ifesto campaign. Its commercial, worth quoting in full, reads as follows:

Once upon a time, men wore the pants, and wore them well. Women rarely had to open doors, and little old ladies never crossed the street alone. Men took charge because that’s what they did. But somewhere along the way, the world decided it no longer needed men. Disco by disco, latte by foamy non-fat latte, men were stripped of their khakis and left stranded on the road between boyhood and androgyny.

It continues,

But today, there are questions our genderless society has no answers for. The world sits idly by, and cities crumble, children misbehave, and those little old ladies remain on one side of the street. For the first time since bad guys, we need heroes. We need grown-ups. We need men to put down the plastic fork, step away from the salad bar, and untie the world from the tracks of complacency. It’s time to get your hands dirty. It’s time to answer the call of manhood. It’s time to wear the pants.

The pants company rightly observes that cities crumble without men living as men. We need heroes that do not beat up those they swore to protect, and heroes who are willing to take off their superman pajamas, put down their frothy drinks, and act more like Clark Kent — the very thing our sexless society is trying to make harder than ever.

Too often we swing from decrying chauvinism and abuse to producing a society of plastic forks, non-fat lattes, and men who don’t mind going to church because of the free babysitting. When our children look at men today — the kind in television shows, homes, and the classroom — what do they see? What is this masculinity of tomorrow we are all concerned with?

Manicured Manhood

Just having returned from a visit to “the greatest place on earth,” my wife and I were shocked at how many men boldly acted like women. Lispy sentences, light gestures, soft mannerisms, and flamboyant jokes were everywhere to be seen — on display for a park flooded with children. No hiding it. No shame. No apologizing. This perversion of masculinity warranted no commercials.

Instead, our society celebrates what Paul calls literally “soft men” (Greek malakoi), a group that will not enter the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 6:9). And discomfort at this will-not-inherit-the-kingdom version of manliness is exactly a symptom of what the APA finds malignant in traditional manhood. But as much as the APA and LGBTQs protest it as hate speech, the effeminate shall not enter the kingdom of God, and it is unloving not to say so.

While men who brutalize and manipulate represent one form of perversion (the kind companies now put their dollars into supporting), men who sit passive, complacent, spiritually and emotionally frail, represent another. So also do men who rebel against their sex by acting like women. And too many classrooms that celebrate this perversion act as accomplices to confusing the boys (and girls) of today. Paul commands all men, “Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong” (1 Corinthians 16:13), and offers them the hope of the gospel that they too might be “washed, sanctified, and justified, in the name of Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of God” (1 Corinthians 6:11).

David Mathis rightly tells us that the strongest men are gentle. But do not hear him saying that godly men are soft, fragile, weak, or effeminate. They do not faint in the day of adversity. They dress for war every day against forces of evil. They are sacrificial initiators, not limp deferrers. Men who charge against enemy gates, leading from the front, and refusing to take cover behind their wives and children. They lead. They protect. They initiate. They love. They sacrifice. They work. They worship. They are men.

When Men Killed Dragons

Godly men are neither severe nor effeminate. They have a sword, but use it against the dragon, not the princess in the castle. They are safe to those God calls them to protect, dangerous to the flesh and the kingdom of darkness. They have more to do than restrain themselves; they live for the glory of God. They mount their horse, gird up their loins, and “ride out for the cause of truth and meekness and righteousness” (Psalm 45:4). And their General, instead of handing them plastic forks, “trains their hands for war that their arms might bend a bow of bronze” (2 Samuel 22:35).

They are like Moses, not Pharoah. They do not lord their power in hopes of cowardly self-preservation. They stand against an empire with the Lord over all empires, calling for tyrants to heed the God of heaven and earth. They are assertive and yet comprise the meekest men on the planet. They make unpopular decisions, meet regularly with their God, and constantly insist, “Thus saith the Lord.”

They are like David, not Saul. They do not hide when duty calls. They gladly go into battle, when others will not, in the venture of their God’s fame. They kill tens of thousands of sins, and fight the more fearful enemy than Goliath. They dress in armor too big for them: God’s (Ephesians 6:13). They know much warfare and yet can testify that God’s gentleness makes them great (2 Samuel 22:36). Battle-tested, yet they may give themselves to things such as poetry. And should they ever shirk their duty and do wickedly, they repent before God and trust in his mercy and steadfast love to restore them.

The Best a Man Can Get

Such men are like Jesus, not the world’s soft-serve substitute. The smiley, flowy-haired, manicured Jesus is an idol. The Jesus of the Bible is the King of kings and the Lord of lords, who will return with a sword in his mouth and heaven’s army in his wake. He is the thrice holy man of war, the great redeemer, the sinner’s friend, who calls all to repentance, faith, and obedience. Vengeance is his; he will repay.

And yet, he also calls children to himself. He washes disciples’ feet. He speaks gracious words to the oppressed, champions the widow’s cause, and calls the contrite near. A bruised reed he does not break, and a faintly burning wick he does not snuff. Tough, yet tender.

Satan hates such biblical masculinity. He pressures men like never before to apologize for being what God has made him. He hands him androgyny, effeminacy, passivity, pornography, plastic forks, and salad plates. He calls it a social construct and sends the Delilah of feminism to strip him of his passion, ambition, and strength, laughing as men ache while watching Braveheart. But while he hates that God made them both male and female (Genesis 1:27), we can show the world the best a man can get: gentleness and strength, holy compassion and holy aggression. In a word, Christ.

Greg Morse is a staff writer for desiringGod.org and graduate of Bethlehem College & Seminary. He and his wife, Abigail, live in St. Paul.

Posted at: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/grooming-the-next-generation?fbclid=IwAR1Y7Pd_atLlJVozHhGvPIr6zSN8DXLelxrHWdaFvZe2cHuwTiXRHpXwX5k

A New Year

Article by Bev Moore

Here we are at the start of a new year.  Many of us will make resolutions or set goals, hoping that this year will be better than the last one.

One of my goals is to grow in my relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.  I pray this verse for myself: “I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death” (Philippians 3:10).  The first two requests sound pretty good—to know Christ and the power of His resurrection.  But then there’s one more—sharing in the fellowship of His sufferings. If I’m going to grow in my understanding of God and know the power of His resurrection, I’m going to have to understand that life this side of heaven is going to be hard and include suffering.  Growth is difficult and will require effort on my part as I trust God for His grace to help me in good times and as well as in hard times.

To aid me in my desire to grow in my relationship with the Lord, I’d like to share with you some thoughts to aid me in my quest.  These should be relatively easy to remember since they all start with the letter P.

Passion

I’m praying that the Lord will give me a passion for Him and for His Word.  If I’m going to grow I need to go to the source of truth on a daily basis.  I have to read His Word every day.  I have found that I need to think great thoughts of God if I want to develop a love and passion for Him.  If left to myself, I’m prone to conform God to my idea of who He is or what He should be like. He is a magnificent God and I don’t want to reduce Him to something He’s not.

Application: To develop a passion for the Lord, we have to truly know Him.  We can grow in our understanding of Him by reading the Bible, praying, and reading books that aid us in our Christian walk.  Decide on a plan to read God’s Word, and then stick with it, even if you miss a day here or there.  Read through the entire Bible or maybe just the New Testament this year.  Start your prayer time with focusing on God’s attributes—His holiness, His faithfulness, His power—and how those relate to your life.  Ask your pastor or Sunday school leader for recommendations for good books to read.

Purpose

My purpose in this life is to glorify, honor, please, and reflect the image of God.  I would like people to get a better picture of who God is by the way I live my life and respond to life’s difficulties.  Any lesser purpose focuses on me and my comfort.

Application: Memorize 2 Corinthians 5:9: So we make it our goal to please Him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it.  Repeat it to yourself several times during the day so that this truth will influence the daily choices you make.  All of life should be filtered through pleasing and honoring God because of who He is and what He has done for us.

Productivity

I want to bear fruit for the Lord.  The Lord Jesus said that He chose us to bear fruit, fruit that will last (John 15:16).  But I have to keep in mind that earlier in this passage Jesus said that God is working in my life to make me more fruitful.  This entails being trimmed or pruned.  God is chipping away everything in me that doesn’t look like Jesus Christ.  And chipping can be painful.  God disciplines us so that we will share in His holiness.  Even though discipline is painful, it will reap a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it (Hebrews 12:10-11).

Application: Get involved in serving, either at your church or somewhere in your community.  Don’t be afraid of committing to serve on a regular basis.  You may need to shadow someone for a while to understand a particular ministry.  This may seem uncomfortable for a while, but there is great joy in serving others.

Perseverance

I think most of us would like to grow in perseverance.  We like seeing a project the whole way through.  There’s something very satisfying when a job is finally done and you’re enjoying the fruit of your labor.  But developing perseverance is not easy.  The Apostle Paul tells us that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance produces character, and character produces hope (Romans 5:3-4).  And James tells us that we are to consider trials joy because they produce perseverance in us and helps us mature in our Christian life (James 1:2-4).  The only way I’m going to grow in my relationship with Christ and develop perseverance is to go through the sufferings He willingly experienced on my behalf.

Application: Remember that life is a marathon, not a sprint.  Resist giving in to discouragement when life gets hard.  Even though there may be times we want to give up, we have to keep the end goal in mind.  Choose to keep up with daily or weekly commitments, even when you don’t feel like it.  Feelings can’t be in charge.

Praise

When life is going well, praising God for His goodness is not that difficult.  Praising God when life is hard is very much a challenge.  We want life to go smoothly, but when we go through trials, we don’t always experience joy.  Yet we can praise God because He promises to work all things (even our difficulties) together for our good as He transforms us into the likeness of His Son (Romans 8:28-29).  He is preparing us for eternity with Him, when there will be no more pain, sorrow or death.  We can praise and thank God because He desires to use us to further His kingdom.  Much of this goes back to having the right perspective of our purpose: to know Him and the power of His resurrection, and sharing in the fellowship of His suffering, becoming like Him in His death.

Application: Spend time daily praising God for who He is.  Start a list of things to be thankful for and add to your list each day.  If you’re struggling, make a list of His attributes and start thinking about the greatness of our God.

So, if you haven’t made any resolutions or goals for this new year, gear up for a year of growth.  This will happen by purposefully and prayerfully growing in your passion for God and His Word.  Remember that your purpose in life is to please, honor and glorify God as you seek to be more fruitful for His kingdom.  Persevere in the goals you set for yourself and be sure to praise Him for His goodness to you!

Posted at: https://blogs.faithlafayette.org/counseling/2019/01/a-new-year/?fbclid=IwAR3JDYGen0WEFpkJOPrv5S541fE05U32cEfNiWWHQFeIfnVkq2lDDWhHY-k

8 Steps to Real Repentance From Psalm 51

Article by Catherine Parks

My brother and I had a nightly childhood ritual of asking one another’s forgiveness for a list of vague sins. Having been warned not to let the sun go down on our anger, we made sure to cover all possibilities of sins we may have committed during the day. “Aaron, I’m sorry for yelling at you, hitting you, being selfish with the Nintendo, and tattling on you today. Will you forgive me?” His answer, along with his own confession, came back to my room in return. Thus we slept in the peace of the slightly remorseful.

When I read Psalm 51 (written by David after the prophet Nathan confronted him with his sin), I realize how lacking my childhood confessions were. Even many of my confessions in adulthood leave much to be desired.

Often we treat repentance as a statement—an “I’m sorry, please forgive me” that checks a box and (hopefully) alleviates our guilt. But if we look closely at Psalm 51, we see that repentance is a turning away from sin and a turning toward God—a process that doesn’t merely alleviate guilt but cultivates deep joy.

So how do we grow in a joy-giving habit of repentance? Here are eight steps.

1. Define the sin.

The first step to meaningful confession is understanding what sin is. David uses three different words for it in Psalm 51: “iniquity,” “sin,” and “transgressions” (vv. 1–3). Each term has been deliberately chosen for its unique meaning. “Transgression” is rebellion against God’s authority and law, “iniquity” is a distortion of what should be, and “sin” is missing the mark. David also says his sin is deep—there is no minimizing or excusing it.

2. Appeal to God’s mercy.

The psalm begins: “Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love” (v. 1). Here, David appeals for forgiveness based on what he knows about God’s character: that he is merciful. David knows God is committed to him in a relationship of “unfailing love”—and when we come before God in repentance, we do so because of his covenant with us through Christ.

3. Avoid defensiveness and see God rightly.

David’s sin hurt multiple people. He committed adultery, orchestrated a murder, and tried to cover it all up. And yet he says to God, “against you, you only, have I sinned” (v. 4). How can that be? Sin is missing the mark—God’s mark. Our sin does hurt others, and we must seek forgiveness from them, but all sin is ultimately against God.

4. Look to Jesus.

David writes, “Cleanse me with hyssop, and I shall be clean” (v. 7). He knows hyssop signifies purification with blood (see Ex. 24), and he knows that blood alone can make him clean. What he doesn’t know is exactly how this will be done. But we do. We have the full revelation of Jesus, who “has appeared once for all at the culmination of the ages to do away with sin by the sacrifice of himself” (Heb. 9:26).

5. Ask God to break and heal you.

David prays, “Let the bones you have crushed rejoice” (v. 8). When God reveals our sin to us, it’s painful. It’s never pleasant to confront just how unholy we are. But like a doctor resetting a fractured bone, it is God who breaks, God who sets, and God who heals.

6. Be comforted by the Spirit.

Next David prays, “Do not . . . take your Holy Spirit from me” (v. 11). But the fact that David is grieved over his sin is a sign that the Spirit is at work in him. Have you ever been so discouraged by your sin that you’ve wondered, How can God love me? Surely I’m not really a Christian. Take comfort in knowing that the grief you’re experiencing is a sign that you have the Holy Spirit working in you, causing you to hate what God hates.

7. Rejoice and proclaim truth.

In verses 12–15, David asks God to make him so joyful about his salvation that he can’t help but proclaim the gospel to others: “Open my lips, Lord, and my mouth will declare your praise.” This is important, because so often we do the opposite—we wallow in our sin and draw back from serving others because we think we’re unworthy. But the joy of forgiveness should compel us to share the good news with friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors.

8. Resolve to obey.

We can do all the steps above, but if we’re planning to sin in the same way again, then grace isn’t truly taking root. What God desires is the mark of true repentance—a heart that is “broken” by sin and truly “contrite.”

As Puritan pastor Thomas Watson wrote, “‘Til sin be bitter, Christ will not be sweet.” If we come to God with a heart set on obedience, he “will not despise” it because of Christ’s sacrifice on our behalf (v. 17).

Unlike my childhood bedtime apologies, practicing this kind of repentance has led to deep joy as I learn to hate my sin and love my Savior more. It has also led me to open up with others, not seeking to hide my sin, but enlisting others in praying for me and building a community of women who fight our sin together. Like David, it’s my joy to tell others of God’s grace and forgiveness, depending on Christ each step of the way.

Editors’ note: 

This article is adapted from Catherine Parks’s new book, Real: The Surprising Secret to Deeper Relationships (The Good Book Company, 2018).

Article posted at: https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/steps-repentance-psalm-51/

GOOD

Article by Paul David Tripp

The word rolls off our tongue so easily.

Good.

“Wow, this cereal is so good!”
“We had a good time at the park.”
“Let me tell you where to get a good cup of coffee.”
“Sam is a really good husband.”

It’s become such a familiar and mundane word in our vocabulary that our mind doesn’t take the time to consider the content. So when we read that God is good, what’s meant to happen inside our soul doesn’t always happen.

“Truly God is good to Israel” - Psalm 73:1. When you read the words, “God is good,” your heart should be filled with many things: wonder, amazement, gratitude, and humility, to name a few.

But I am convinced that many of us live day after day with no wonderment whatsoever. We exist for weeks, maybe even months, without being amazed. We walk through life without an overwhelming sense of gratitude. We handle our situations, locations, and relationships with an attitude of entitlement.

This is the opposite of the way we were created to live. We were meant to live with eyes gazing upward and outward. We were designed to live with hearts that are searching and hungry (and being satisfied in God).

Every word we speak, every action we take, every decision we make, and every desire we entertain was meant to be influenced by our awe of God’s goodness.

But because of sin, few things impress us anymore. Or, at least, the wrong things are the ones that make the biggest impression.

When sin takes your amazement away, you’ll look for ways to fill the void. And if you’re not getting your sense of wonder vertically from the Creator, you will look for it somewhere in the creation.

Has it happened to you? Are you shopping for the buzz of wonder where it simply won’t be found?

That new restaurant will blow your taste buds away, but it won’t introduce you to the soul-satisfying wonder of God. That new car will transport you in luxury for a while, but it has no capacity whatsoever to transport your soul to a place of peace. Your new job title might impress your friends and family at first, but it cannot supply you with the glory that you’re seeking.

Asaph, the Psalmist, uncovers what we’re all looking for in a single word:

“Good”

We’re looking for pure, unadulterated, imperishable, unending, and unfailing good. Good that only God can provide. Good that we want and need.

Truly, God is good in every possible way. Good in:

Righteousness
Power
Grace
Faithfulness
Provision
Mercy
Holiness
Justice
Anger
Sovereignty

All his words are good. All his actions are good. When he gives, he is good. When he takes, he is good.

Nothing in creation is like him. Everything around us is flawed in some way. Even before the Fall, no glory in creation compared to the beauty of the Creator.

No, it’s not too good to be true: God is good all the time and in every way.

That should amaze you every single day!

God bless

Reflection Questions

1. What have you described as good this week?

2. Why did you believe it to be good?

3. In what ways does the goodness of this thing fail to measure up to the goodness of God?

4. At the same time, how does the goodness of that thing reveal the goodness of God?

5. How can you live with more wonder, amazement, gratitude, and humility this week, at the thought of the goodness of God?

Posted at: pauldavidtripp.com

When "Thy Will Be Done" Becomes Self-Protection

Article by Brittany Lee Allen

I was restless. Many thoughts bouncing from one side of my head to the other, colliding and creating more thoughts. Silently, I watched the Black-Capped Chickadees dash across the yard into the white spruce right outside the window, their quickness mimicking the questions and fears racing through my mind.

How do you keep bringing your broken heart before the God who allowed it to be shattered?

That’s what I found myself wondering. It just seems easier to keep our distance and bury our longings in the tomb with all that’s been lost.

The Idol of Self-Protection

Praying for things we desire comes naturally for many people but for me, it’s a struggle. I fear my heart’s quick reaction to such prayers—how it turns my requests into idols. I don’t want to desire the created thing more than the Creator, so I don’t ask. But in not taking my supplications to him, I keep back a part of my heart from him, and therefore, provide fresh soil for the roots of another idol to deepen.

My “good” theology morphs into self-protection. You see, if I don’t ask for a baby, if a single gal doesn’t ask for a husband, or a cancer patient doesn’t ask for healing, maybe it won’t hurt as much if God doesn’t fulfill that desire. Sometimes praying “thy will be done” becomes a cover-up for “I’m too scared to ask” revealing the underlying disbelief in a heart.

The Good God Who Withholds

We struggle to believe God could withhold something good we’ve asked for and still be good himself. But we forget he withholds no good thing from his children (Psalm 84:11). Truly, he knows best. And because he is perfectly wise, good, and sovereign, we can trust he will always choose what’s best for us. Sometimes, that isn’t the “good” thing we hoped for because he has something better.

So often, we have our earthly good in mind, but our Good Father never loses sight of the thing which will cause us to be most blessed, that is, Christlikeness—our eternal good.

An Act of Faith

Many times our prayer for God’s will to be done becomes a way to dodge the discomfort of pouring our heart out before the Lord. For some, it’s an act of faith to pray “your will be done, Lord” while others have to step out in faith to utter the words “please, Lord.”

I’m scared to ask God for what he may not give. I have enough biblical knowledge to know I’m not promised a baby we can raise. Promises like that were given to Abraham and Sarah, Zechariah and Elizabeth, but not to Jim and Brittany Allen. I know that in his goodness, God many times withholds what we long for. Which is why it becomes an act of faith to ask.

Instead of clinging to my heart, trying to protect myself from the possible blow of God’s “no”, I lay it bare and exposed before him and echo Hannah’s prayer in her distress…

“O LORD of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son, then I will give him to the LORD all the days of his life.” (1 Samuel 1:11 ESV)

Hannah had not been promised a child. But that didn’t stop her from pouring out her soul to the Lord (1 Samuel 1:15). She bowed down before her heavenly Father and cried sorrowful tears at his feet and asked. She didn’t add a quick “if it be your will” before her request. She simply asked. Just as a daughter would ask her father.

Because he is our Father, we must trust him to decide what is truly good for us. This is where faith comes into play. This is where surpassing peace can be found. At the feet of our loving Father.

If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him! (Matthew 7:11 ESV)

Let us pour our hearts out before God and ask for what we desire. But let us always do so with a humble heart, knowing he knows best and will do no other.


Posted at: https://brittleeallen.com/2019/01/when-thy-will-be-done-becomes-self-protection/